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Leaving church Can Be Difficult

November 1, 2017 by DoneWithReligion

For those of us who have left the traditional church system, there can be times of discouragement, questioning and just plain not knowing what to do. Do not feel guilty for having such feelings.

I know that my wife and myself became fed up with the religious church system after spending over fifty years in it. Week after week we went to a pre-planned service, sat and watched only a few select people participate and listened to one person talk and tell us about God.

If was obvious there was a divide, a group of people who participated and a group of people who sat and listened. I remember thinking how spiritual the leaders of the church must be and how knowledgeable they were to hold positions in the church. I always thought I had nothing to say that would be important or helpful and I was so thankful for the pastor and the elders who seemed to have it all together.

As time went on I began wondering about certain verses in the bible that talked about each person having a hymn, or a word of instruction, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation.

Or what about verses talking about us as living stones being built up into a spiritual house, a holy priesthood to offer up spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ. To me this says that all Christians are a holy priesthood and can offer spiritual sacrifices to God. All have the right to go directly to God through Jesus Christ our High Priest.

We are told that we are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people that we may proclaim the praises of Him who called us out of darkness into His marvelous light.

All these verses and many others sure sounded to me that we were all capable, under the guidance of the Holy Spirit who lives within us, to be equals with all others who followed Christ. All can serve and fulfill a purpose in the Kingdom of God.

My wife and I came to believe that the divide we see in the Christian church was really very unbiblical. There are no first and second-class citizens of the Kingdom. There should not be a clergy-laity divide within the true Church that God is building through Christ.

church-people-or-building

We were always taught that the church, the brick and mortar building people attend once a week, was the house of God. Yet the bible says that we are the temple of the Holy Spirit and the Kingdom of God is within us.

Finally making the choice to leave the church system, we decided to walk with God outside the walls of religion. This of course is a very unpopular decision in the Christian world. People have lost friends and fellowship with other believers because of this choice because those who are in the system feel leaving it is wrong.

I have heard of many people after leaving became known as back-sliders, people fallen from their faith and who have lost their relationship with God. When people find out we no longer attend a church they do their best to reason with us and try to get us back in line and back in the church system.

After three years being out of the institutional church, neither of us want to go back. We have found a freedom to live with God apart from the denominational requirements, various doctrines, the many man-made ways of following God and the thousands of interpretations of the bible that differ from church to church.

Over time God has brought people into our lives in ways we never expected. We are finding many new relationships online with people who have also left the church system. Fellowship is needed among us followers of Christ but that does not have to be done in a building on a set day and being face to face. In fact, we have had more meaningful relationships being outside of church then we did in it including online and face-to-face fellowship.

MindofChrist

If we believe the Holy Spirit lives within us, that we have the mind of Christ, and that the kingdom of God is within us then we need no man to teach us. The Spirit will guide each of us in the way he has for us to go. We are not going to all agree and walk in perfect agreement, but God leads each of us on separate paths yet leads us all into a close fellowship with Him.

For those with young kids it can be even more troubling because you are not sure what to do with the kids. Yet I believe that God will guide you and bring ways of showing the love of God to your kids whether it be in a group or in your family at home. I do not want to give out ideas for you to try because I believe the Spirit of God will guide and direct you in the way you are to go in teaching your children.

I do believe that God is big enough and personal enough to guide us outside the traditional church and the clergy system we have all know all our lives. It is a difficult road to go but it certainly seems to me a much better way to follow God and live for Him.

What decision you make in regard to attending church or walking outside the walls, remember both groups are children of God and trying to follow Him the way they feel is best. In church or out of church we all make up The Church, each of us equally important and equally able to let God love through us.

Focus of following God in the way he leads you, love others equally, do not think more highly of yourself than of others. Be open to let God lead you on the path he has for you whether it is in traditional religious ways or the unpopular way of living outside the walls of church and religion. Love and accept others as they are and let the love of God touch everyone you meet along the way.

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Posted in christian living, Community, Ekklesia, Kingdom of God, Love of God, Scoop.it, The church | Tagged church, clergy, denominations, Ekklesia, elders, Holy Spirit, laity, pastor, religion | 8 Comments

8 Responses

  1. on November 2, 2017 at 8:17 AM Leaving church Can Be Difficult – carolsimmons

    […] Source: Leaving church Can Be Difficult […]

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  2. on November 2, 2017 at 8:17 AM carolsimmons

    Reblogged this on carolsimmons.

    LikeLike


  3. on November 2, 2017 at 12:43 AM Jem

    Such a very encouraging article, Jim. Thank you! My coming out of church, as it were, coincided with my coming out of the closet in which I had hidden most of my life, so it was somewhat huge in respect of change, and yet at the same time almost a natural progression, though not without lots of pain and anguish, of course. When I think of where I am today I am so very thankful to no longer be tied to the formality of the traditional church (even the charismatic/Pentecostal church seems traditional now). I have a special friend I meet with once a week, in addition to much online contact like this, and yesterday we were both saying our meeting together in the food hall of a huge shopping mall was our church. I am inspired and encouraged by your posts. Thank you so very much.

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    • on November 2, 2017 at 10:27 AM DoneWithReligion

      Thanks so much for the comment. I can imagine some of the pain and anguish you had and I am sorry for what you went through. So true about charismatic, pentecostal, non-denominational churches. I was in many different types of churches over the years and the basic system is the same. So glad you have someone to meet with face-to-face and like me we are blessed with many online brothers and sisters.

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  4. on November 1, 2017 at 9:07 PM Rocky Glenn

    Great article and I agree! “What decision you make in regard to attending church or walking outside the walls, remember both groups are children of God and trying to follow Him the way they feel is best.” . . . While most I have encountered that have also left the church seem to believe this, I have yet to come across those who are still entrenched in the church life that feel this way. If you haven’t heard it, check it out “Stop Listening” from Derek Webb. Its sums it up nicely.

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    • on November 1, 2017 at 9:52 PM DoneWithReligion

      So true Rocky. I have found the same thing. I will check out ‘Stop Listening’. Thanks for the comment.

      LikeLike


  5. on November 1, 2017 at 7:51 PM jmwe29

    “If we believe the Holy Spirit lives within us, that we have the mind of Christ, and that the kingdom of God is within us then we need no man to teach us. The Spirit will guide each of us in the way he has for us to go.” Bravo! Coming to see this truth is what eventually led me out of the system. We were convinced we were all dumb sheep. Well, not any more. Keep up the good work!

    LikeLike


    • on November 1, 2017 at 8:33 PM DoneWithReligion

      Thank you for the comment. I appreciate it

      LikeLike



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