by Jim Gordon
I grew up in the institutional church and was always of the persuasion that being gay was a sin. I felt I was pretty open since saying I hated the sin but loved the sinner, I was doing better than most. Yet, either way I was saying being gay was a sin.
I never treated those who were gay in a bad way. I never treated any of my friends or relatives who were gay any different than I treated anyone else. I saw them as normal everyday people….but with a great sin in their life.
Things changed on this subject, and amazingly it was after leaving the institutional church. I started to see that God loves people, all people. There was no ‘I love you but’ when it came to God. I started to read some on the subject (something I never dreamed of doing before). I read Justin Lee and Matthew Vines. I really thought about a God of love and how could that God condemn people for the way he made them.
I finally began to see the LGBTQ community for who they really are….people. Take away the labels and you have human beings like everyone else. Just because they were born with different sexual views does not make them second class citizens and does not make them deserving of the awful ways they are treated, especially by the christian world. They are doing nothing more than being themselves the way God made them.
Today I seem to have a special sense of wanting to show those who are LGBTQ that all christian people are not the same. I want to help promote information and acceptance between christians and those who are LGBTQ (1). I know many who are LGBTQ (a few personally but most online) and who are christians who love God and serve him. I can no longer say I believe being gay is a sin. I think there is a lot of misunderstanding and misinterpretation by the church and evangelical christians.
I do admit I do not understand the attraction of two men or two women. Of course, that is because I am straight. I bet those who are gay or lesbian do not understand me and my attraction to the opposite sex (well, just one person of the opposite sex, my wife).
I recently read a book by Amber Cantorna called Refocusing My Family. It is such an interesting read, telling of her questions, struggles and hardships in her walk with God and her family. Her traditional christian upbringing and her dad being an employee of Focus on the Family made it extremely hard on her when she realized she was gay. What terrible struggles and treatment she received. It is so hard for me to understand how parents can disown their children, yet I know it happens all the time.
I also believe that the christians who do believe being gay is wrong, they are still handling it all wrong. Whether you agree or disagree, our instructions from Jesus are to love God, love our neighbor and love our enemies. We are to love, not judge and condemn. I have read so many articles about the abuse the gay community takes, beatings, exclusion, disowned by their family, suicides. It is terrible. No matter what stand we take on the issue we are not to judge and condemn. As followers of Christ we are to be known for our love and treating everyone equally.
I personally am tired of the way the christian church has treated those who are LGBTQ. Whether they agree or disagree they should be treating everyone with love. For me I have concluded that being gay is not a sin and I fully love and accept all people just as they are. I hope I can show that love and acceptance to others in some way.
I do not completely understand it but for some reason this topic has taken on a new meaning for me. I am tired of seeing the abuse, the exclusion and the discrimination against those who are LGBTQ. Not sure where this will lead but hopefully, I can be a help by showing love and acceptance to those I meet who are LGBTQ.
(1) https://www.reddit.com/r/LGBTQ_Acceptance/
** UnClobber: Rethinking Our Misuse of the Bible on Homosexuality by Colby Martin
I am also tired of the way much of the Christian Church has treated the LGBTQ community. Once again, I used to treat the LGBTQ community in ways that make me cringe nowadays. At this point, I don’t think the sin is in being LGBTQ, but in not sufficiently loving those who have that identity. Abandoning my transphobia was quite possibly the difference between life and death for a friend on at least one occasion, for example. I hope to write more about this on my own blog in the near future, hopefully Pride Month (if not before).
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Hi Brendan, yes, it is sad that people who are supposed to be known for their love of others can be so condemning and down right hateful at times against those who are LGBTQ. People are people no matter what label is attached to them. We all are loved and accepted by God and it should be the same from God’s people. Thanks so much for reading my article and for your comment.
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From an 20 year old atheist queer woman new to this site, thank you! Christians like you give us hope. A very happy new year to you and your wife!
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Hello Jojo, thank you for taking the time to read my article and to post a comment. I sure do appreciate you doing so. I truly believe all people are to be accepted, respected and loved no matter what they believe and no matter what label has been placed upon them. I hope you have a very happy new year also.
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I feel the same way as you .Churches say they love them and treat them the same but they do not. About a month ago i had a heated talk with my pastor because every meting seam to turn to LGBTQ, and how we should except them but they cannot be part of the church unless they give up sex.Then they can be part of the church. Since then i have been so uncomfortable at church because i don’t agree with their teaching on the subject. My wife for a short time felt the same way but they managed to talk her round to their way of thinking.
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I certainly understand. I grew up in the church system and for a long time held the traditional view that being gay was wrong. After getting out of the organized church I seem to think more for myself and read books and articles that the church would frown upon. There are other ways of looking at this and other interpretations that the church just will not discuss. I agree, the view your pastor seems to take, basically hate the sin love the sinner, and accepting them at the church but only to a limited degree is just another way of saying you are a sinner and you really are not welcome here. It is sad because I believe being gay is not a choice, it is just who they are just like we are straight. We had no choice in that. When you read about Jesus, who came to show us what God is really like, and how he loved and accepted people, how can we be so condemning and hateful to those who are gay? Thanks Nigel for your comment.
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Thank you for this post.
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Thank you, I appreciate it.
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I love this post. It’s such a huge problem in society today, for it to be acceptable to harass people for how they were born. The key place where this needs to be changed is in schools. The amount of bullying that goes on in them is horrible, and I’ve had first hand accounts where the teachers clearly see it and do nothing. There have been more and more Rainbow Alliance clubs being deployed out in middle high and even elementary schools and I think it’s getting better, but it’s a huge part on the teachers to look out for bullying and to stop it.
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Thanks for your comment. It is sad that bullying and mean treatment goes on anywhere. Even worse that teachers and others see it and do nothing.
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Thank you!
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