I wish to expand on that last Post. Church people often evangelize by focusing on how one can get in heaven/inherit eternal life. Is that really the best approach to those interested to discuss spiritual matters? Polls suggest the majority of people believe in an afterlife. We can only speculate what eternal existence/afterlife with God is like.
What does the Bible actually say about having eternal life?
Many think the overall biblical message about salvation is to avoid Hell and get into heaven, Romans 10:9 is cited often: confess with lips that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the Dead you will be saved.” But I don’t think the Bible/Jesus/God’s message is dropping to your knees to avoid Hell to go to Heaven after death. Instead, I am convinced the main biblical message is to start loving now – a path toward great relationships. God’s main desire is for you isn’t about avoiding Hell, but to live a life avoiding regrets by treating others like you want to be treated. See:
The main message isn’t about God saving us to enter Heaven after life on Earth
Jesus said: “I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me” (Jn 14:6). Did Jesus really mean God only saves those who accept Jesus? Keep in mind the majority of people born into this world have never heard of Jesus or had a Bible. Jesus wasn’t born until the first century. The Bible as we know it today didn’t exist until the fourth century. John 14:6 could easily be interpreted to mean Jesus’ way of life is the best path toward God. The path to God is through love. (See God After Deconstruction, Oord/Fuller Chapter 9). We Christians need to be less condemning and more open to God’s love and message to people of all religions. See What religion goes to heaven
Jesus was asked by a religious leader how to have eternal life. (Lk.10:25-37). I doubt the leader had in mind how to get into Heaven away from this Earth. Jesus elsewhere defined eternal life as beginning in the here and now (Jn 17:3), not what awaited in the afterlife. Jesus simply said to love God and your neighbor. “Eternal” appears to be on the quality not quantity in life. Jesus spoke of a life worth living being a loving life empowered by God. Whether one chooses belief in God and possible empowerment is an individual choice. Jesus’ salvation was about living a meaningful life here on earth with God’s help. The Bible/Jesus/God’s message isn’t dropping to your knees to avoid Hell to go to Heaven after death, but start loving now – a path toward great relationships. See: What Is Main Message About Bible/Jesus That Christians Get Wrong?
Besides can’t all enter heaven anyway regardless of beliefs?
There are possible intuitive and biblical reasons to consider God doesn’t required belief in God to be in his grace. The best way I know to understand God’s love is how I or a parent loves their children. My love isn’t based on if my kids show they love me or believe in my guidance. I can’t stop loving them. Neither can God!
There is some biblical evidence that in the afterlife, God welcomes all and will attempt to convince them and live with God forever. There are rational reasons God doesn’t appear physically here on earth. Beside the majority of people born in this world didn’t have access to a Bible or know of Jesus. See: All Will End Up In Heaven According To The Bible Being a universalist can be biblical: I am a hopeful universalist because ultimately I believe God respects one’s freedom to choose their destiny. It is just hard for me to believe hardly anyone would reject God seeing and knowing what God is really like and not wanting to live forever with loved ones. I guess there are the Hitlers out there!
Hidden argument – reveal yourself God!
Let’s be honest. We can’t prove God exist. Why condemn those who struggle to accept if there is a God (agnostic or atheist). A fair argument about whether God really exist is why then is God so hidden. The idea that if an all-loving God truly exists and wants to have a personal relationship with those desiring such a relationship, why doesn’t God make their presence obvious. Such signs could convince many, removing distress and uncertainty. There may be reasonable reasons God is hidden here on earth. See: If God Is Real, Why Then Is God So Hidden?
What one belief only matters according to all religions?
Many religions claim one main belief. Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, and Buddhism—the strongest common ground is treating others well. Jesus said when asked what the greatest commandment was: “Love God and love your neighbor.” [Matthew 22:36-40] Loving God is following God’s ways, surely meaning loving your neighbor as you wish to be loved.
So, do you believe in God or least the golden rule?
If you believe loving others like you want to be loved is central in living, you are good in God’s eyes. None of us act on this belief perfectly. If you don’t believe this, good luck on your death bed regarding relationships. Want to die with few regrets. Follow the golden rule. Want your relationships to suck, don’t follow the golden rule. Few will show up at your funeral.
God’s end goal
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the Done with Religion site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
In my last Post I wrote about something very controversial. One may be in God’s grace same as a believer and not know it. See here. What inspired me to write it is that I have many friends who very much live a life of love, yet don’t think of their lifestyle motivation being because of inspiration or belief in God. God is seldom if ever mentioned in their conversations. They live a very moral life, that puts to shame many who refer to themselves as Christians or believers. Many are inclined to believe in a God, though hesitate to take a leap of faith.
Now let’s discuss what about those who are skeptical or just don’t even believe in God.
The Bible may be a main reason for hesitation or unbelief
I am convinced many inclined to believe in God but don’t is because of claims made about God by those who call themselves Christians. It is seldom admitted literature requires interpretation, so your understanding of God according to the Bible could be wrong. Biblical scholars do not agree what the Bible teaches about many moral issues.I am convinced a literal Hell is a biblical myth. See here. We get wrong that God thinks women can’t serve in the same religious or marriage roles that men can. See here. Also, we get wrong that God condemns gays according to the Bible. See here. But the biggest myth may be that God’s main message according to the Bible is that salvation is about going to Heaven or Hell rather than how to live life here on earth. People reject God based on claims about hell, women, gays. It is important to know that God cares about you here and now and not about just the afterlife. See:
Perhaps the main reason many who may be inclined to believe in a Supreme Being but aren’t motivated to take the leap of faith is because of the presence of so much evil in the world and God doesn’t intervene. Some explanations are better than many rationalizations give. Perhaps, God can’t be all-powerful because love isn’t controlling. See here:
Thomas Oord beliefs have brought me the most comfort during my medical challenge. See:
Another fair argument about whether God really exist is why then is God so hidden. The idea that if an all-loving God truly exists and wants to have a personal relationship with those desiring such a relationship, why doesn’t God make their presence obvious. Such signs could convince many, removing distress and uncertainty. See Greg’s post here:
Can’t all enter heaven anyway?
Another good reason to believe God doesn’t required belief in God to be in his grace or achieve eternal life is both intuitive and biblical. The best way I know to understand God’s love is how I or a parent loves their children. My love isn’t based on if my kids show they love me or believe in my guidance. I can’t stop loving them. Neither can God!
There is some biblical evidence that in the afterlife, God welcomes all and will attempt to convince them and live with God forever. There are rational reasons God doesn’t appear physically here on earth. Besides, the majority of people born in this world didn’t have access to a Bible or know of Jesus. See: All Will End Up In Heaven According To The Bible
C’mon Edwards…you have to believe Jesus resurrected from the dead?
Jesus’ disciples didn’t believe Jesus’ claims of resurrection until seeing the spike marks three days later after the Cross. Maybe if you saw someone die on a Cross and saw them alive days later, you would believe too. And believe that Jesus was more than human. Are you leaning toward than away from God. God welcomes you.
I currently am convinced Jesus’ resurrection isn’t legend and has historical verification, but others may not. I don’t believe God hates me if I change my mind. Jesus’ disciples didn’t believe Jesus was coming back from the dead, despite witnessing Jesus’ miracles beforehand, until seeking Jesus after his death with their own eyes. I would like to think many of us seeing a man or woman coming back from the grave, after killed on a cross, would be convinced. I have a hunch God cares the most that you believe in the possibility of a loving God to begin a faith journey.
I have a hunch God especially loves skeptics!
Personally, I don’t want to dimmish the power of belief in a loving God. God’s influence in my life has been awe-inspiring. A parent obviously loves a child who struggles to accept them and their ways. We don’t unlove our skeptical children. Is God any different? Spiritual or human parents don’t desire forced love, which isn’t genuine, but hope for consideration and to prove the possibility of a better relationship. Many may not pursue a relationship with a God they are inclined to believe in because of what they have heard from others what God is like. Don’t believe everything you hear! God only seeks to love you like you wish you were able to love others. This is the God you can believe in and seek influence in living a purposeful, meaningful live.
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the Done with Religion site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
Understandings and mental views of God shape your beliefs in God and a relationship with God
God views you as scum and is pissed!
I only know what a loving God may be like according to how a parent should love their child. I figure God didn’t create us to be better lovers than God. My kids weren’t always saints but I hated their behavior, not them. I would suggest that Scripture shows that God sees human beings as deeply loved, valuable, and made in His image, even though we are also broken by sin. See here.
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
I write a lot about this topic as I named my blog over 15 years ago What God May Really Be Like So I often revisit what God may really be like. I used the word “May” because I was countering dogmatism growing up in church. Who knows what God is really like unless God talks to you directly? I am claiming that if you are told something about God that goes against universal moral intuitions, question it – such as is a literal Hell real? There are many interpretations of the English word “Hell” in the Bible. Would a loving God really create a torturous afterlife place for unbelievers? Intuitively, the only God worth believing in must be perfectly loving and moral. We can only assume what love is by comparing to perfect human love.
God must be good intuitively!
Many of us left organized religion, not God, because claims about God’s character was contrary to our deepest moral intuitions. It doesn’t make sense why a Creator wouldn’t love the same way we humans believe we were seemingly created by a Creator to love (aka goodness vs. evil). Even those who try to defend God’s violent ways in the Old Testament agree, or they wouldn’t attempt to rationalize why a supposed inspired/infallible Book by God reports bad actions contributed to God. We can’t always understand what perfect love is – to help a drug addict or let them hit bottom – but even the Bible assume we can understand God’s perfect love/goodness through human lens – “be perfect, as your heavenly God is perfect.” (Mt 5:48).
God can only be understood through “goodness” lens anyway
If God is bad or evil at times, we can only understand such actions by comparing/exploring what is good. If God was supposedly unloving, we can only pursue such knowledge by discussing what true love it. It seems we can only rely on human reasoning to decide what interpretation of the Bible is more likely, what are loving human actions toward others, or understanding what God’s love is like.
How do we know what “good” is?
Parents create/have children to be loved and teach how to love others. An existing Creator surely creates desiring to love and be loved. God surely love how we know parents should love their children. We all seem to know the question we ought to ask ourselves – am I loving others perfectly? That is how God loves. We know how we should love and how God loves – are you loving others like you want to be loved? We may not always be certain the most loving action, unless my son or son-in laws mistreat women! There is a reason anyone who justifies selfishness is often friendless.
Our inborn sense of good and evil, not an ancient Book, tells us sexual abuse or murder is immoral. Self-evident morals aren’t hidden in any Holy Book If one thinks their Creator loves contrary to universal moral intuitions (should infidels be destroyed in this life?), it is because of their interpretation of a supposed inspired Book by their God. When there is debate about laws we must have discussions.
Surely, perfect human love is the same as Godly love
The only God worth believing in must be perfectly loving as opposed to in any way hateful. God’s love surely is the same as supreme parents – other-directed not self-consumed. Love gets excited when we do well and make a difference in the lives of others. Love anticipates, hopes for my success, believes in me, pulls for me even when failing, because I do the same for my children. We doubt God but God still loves. Parents bring children into the world hoping their children freely reciprocate their love for authentic relationships. Why would God be any different.
Why wouldn’t God be most like what our moral intuitions suggest?
God’s goodness isn’t just according to the Bible!
Ancient literature is subject to interpretation. Even if the writers understood their God perfectly, which we can’t prove, we can’t claim our interpretations are perfect. The truth is biblical scholars who have a deep respect for the Bible don’t agree what God thinks about gays, women, hell, and other moral issues. See here. See here.See here. Gays are supposedly condemned, women’s leadership roles are limited, despite their gifts and a fiery torturous afterlife awaits infidels – all in God’s name
A Book cannot be the sole determinate of what God is like since the same passages are subject to different interpretations. Also, the majority of people born in this world did not have a copy of the Bible. We are left to wonder how a Perfect God, the only God worth believing in, truly loves. It is only intuitive that a Creator loves the ways their creations ought to love one another. We all seem to know the question we ought to ask ourselves – am I loving others like I want to be loved. It isn’t presumptuous to imagine what a loving God is like through our moral consciences. See here.
What was Jesus’ thoughts on God’s goodness or love?
Many, including me, are convinced to understand Jesus is to understand God. It seems Jesus came to suggest salvation is a current life of love, not a future destination to avoid Hell. Jesus told the woman who had committed adultery: “go now, and leave your life of sin” (John 8). Where was Jesus’ evangelical spiel? Jesus was asked by a religious expert how to have eternal life. He simply said to love God and your neighbor (Lk.10:25-37), since loving God leads to loving others. Jesus confronted the religious who kept laws but didn’t follow Jesus with their heart. Godly love surely seeks to empower us to be the unselfish people we deep down desire to be for a better world. See here.
Goodness or Godly love is exactly the same!
The Bible doesn’t always describe God in perfect human moral terms, so may God-believers resort to suggesting God’s actions are sometimes a mystery. Believers assume God must be perfectly good so rationalizations are made, since they assume the entire Bible is approved/inspired by God, They must explain why the Bible reports God acting violently or destructively. See 9 Reasons To Not Trust The Bible’s Claims About God! But a Book can’t be the definitive word about God since subject to different interpretations, and we can’t prove God always controlled what the writers understood and wrote about God.
How you imagine God’s love can determine how you relate to God
The truth is we can’t know definitely what an invisible God’s love is like. But the only God worth believing in loves perfectly. What is perfect love?
I propose we can know what God’s perfect love is like but imagining what a perfect parent’s is like. We can’t always know what perfect love is – whether to let an addict hit bottom or force them into rehabilitation – but only the guilty don’t know sexual abuse or domestic violence is evil.
If we think God is hard to please and pissed off about sin rather than what sin is doing to us, we may judge others just as harshly rather than showing patience and mercy
If God is really a warlike God according to the OT, we will use such behaviors to possibly justify going to war when we should
If God condemns gays, we will condemn gays out of devotion to God
If God thinks men have authority over women in some positions, that will filter down to your wives, daughters, and friends and stifle their gifts.
I’m convinced belief in a benevolent God, according to common moral intuitions, makes you kinder. We often treat others the way we think God treats us. How has God’s threats of punishment helped you break away from bad habits or behaviors you long to change? I guess fear God if helps to avoid consequences of destructive actions. But if struggling and need encouragement and mercy, a loving God awaits with open arms. Grace or authoritativeness doesn’t guarantee change, but I believe we best change because of a friend’s or God’s love and acceptance. See It Matters If Your God Is Nurturing Or Authoritative!
Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. Mike also writes on his own site that can be found at What God May Really Be Like He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com
This is the first time I am responding to the below post written 6/22/25 when a tumor was found in my brain. See update after initial Post below. I still have brain cancer. The tumor was removed but I still get brain scans that the tumor is not back growing. I am done with radiation and chemo treatment for the next 6 months but who knows after that. For some reason the initial diagnosis of the MRI that you have a tumor in your head didn’t freak me out. I just went in death-mode preparation. I don’t have scan freak-outs that I get every 2-3 months (maybe because I take a zanax), but I am too aware that brain cancer could come back and decisions will have to be made. I don’t know if I want to go through chemo again or whatever.
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Long story short 6/22/25
On April 15, 2025 my tennis partner, who is a Doctor, sensed I was off. (More than usual). I typically walk home after the match, but he insisted in driving me home and that I see my regular Doctor. I am so thankful for his urging. I saw my Doctor a day or two later and an MRI was scheduled. Within hours I got a call that I had a tumor in my brain. I had very few symptoms before except minor headaches that I thought nothing of. I was ready to play a third set of tennis that day but my buddies said no. Guess I was acting off/weird. Within days of the MRI, I was scheduled for brain surgery to remove the tumor (April 21). I spent those few days preparing my family, not knowing if I would make it out of the surgery alive or have motor skills severely damaged. Things went very well in terms of the tumor being removed (cancer still remains), The tumor was a severe cancer type. So, I begin chemo/radiation treatment shortly after for 6 weeks. I’m in my last week of 6 weeks of treatment.
No, God didn’t CAUSE my tumor!
I hope no one thinks God caused this tumor to teach me a lesson for my sins. I ain’t no saint but I’m kinder than most folks. I have friends who will verify. I know some selfish/evil people that are cancer free. I refuse to believe a loving God using tragedies to punish or teach one a lesson and we remain clueless reasons for such actions. Besides, that assumes God is simply pulling strings to control events in the world. Did God cause this for a greater good. I doubt it. God can’t control how I will react to a tragedy in my life. I could be pissed at God and no good comes of it. Some claim all evil eventually leads to good as if some grand plan by God. Not my God! Ask sexual abuse victims or family members of murdered loved ones if good always comes out of evil.
Or it is claimed we sinners have no right to question a Holy God. I have a God I can doubt, question, get angry with, whatever. That is what a loving parent/God is like. How do I know this? I have been a child of a parent and a parent of children. Why would a Creator create us to have intuitions of what true love is (allowing a child to question) but not be loving themself?
See Does God Really Punish Or We Just Reap What We Sow? Assuming God is in control of punishment makes a mockery of freedom. It is an oxymoron to claim God is in complete control and we humans have freedom. If God does actively punish and carry out wrath, God is letting a whole lot of evil in the world slide. God doesn’t love more those spared than those supposedly punished.
Does God Really Allow Cancer?
It is claimed a mystery how God can allow evil but not be evil. Humans don’t get a free pass if they can stop evil but don’t. Ask sexual abuse victims when their parent knew and did nothing. One might ask why God allows such harm if supposedly all-powerful. Thinking God is all-powerful (thus all-controlling) assumes God can pull strings to make certain things happen (allow). So much for genuine freedom? See God Can’t Stop Your Suffering And Evil!
Thankfully, I don’t entertain such a view of God which has helped having a positive view during all this, though I have many miles to travel in my journey. My silent friend (God), along with family and friends have been a life-saver. You have a lot of internal conversations when waiting for brain surgery or going through cancer. When one believes “God allows” your mind can wander. Why me and not others (is God’s love arbitrary – if God can supposedly control everything), what lesson is God trying to teach me. I never had to go there. I am convinced God isn’t all-powerful.
If we maintain that God limits their Power, this suggests God can do something but doesn’t. We must come up with a better explanation that God simply allows – thus controls – evils but isn’t responsible for such evils. A God who can prevent evil but doesn’t is counter-intuitive to love. No loving parent or God sits idly by when they could prevent tragedies such as rape or murder. Are we to believe God doesn’t care, God is punishing us, or God has abandoned us and left us clueless about the grand plan? God doesn’t just allow your suffering!
God may not be all powerful
It is only natural to believe a Supreme Being, if they exist, is all powerful. Most Christians believe this because of their understanding of the Bible taught in churches they attend but questions arise if God is all-powerful. If God can control everything, why doesn’t God intervene more in medical emergencies, rape, physical abuse, etc. A miracle supposedly saved Trump but not the gentlemen in the front row. I doubt it. God doesn’t pick and choose when to cause or allow suffering.
God can’t be all-powerful if all-loving. Perfect love isn’t controlling. Ask any adult child with a controlling parent. Thomas Oord in his new book defends ably that the Bible doesn’t necessarily claim God is all-powerful and can do anything. See here. God can’t tempt others (Jas. 1:13). It makes no sense to say God can exert all power and creatures can exert some power. I have never understood why God doesn’t stop evil if God can do anything. If “everything happens for a reason” because of God, this would make God responsible for all goodness and all evil. It is claimed a mystery how God can cause or allow evil but not be evil. This isn’t true for humans. Some claim all evil eventually leads to good as if some grand plan by God. Hardly!
What about prayer and miracles?
Many prayers asking for healing are obviously not answered. Are miracles arbitrary – God picking and choosing to bless some and not others? Conditions in our body may not always be right. Various biological and environmental factors are involved such as cells, organs, etc. If God wouldn’t take away your human freedom, it may not be a stretch to say God has to account for natural freedom as well. Miracles can happen when God’s uncontrolling love aligns with countless factors known and not known. God surely intervenes when circumstances will allow. Pray if you like, but God is already working to do all God can to prevent suffering. That’s what perfect Love does! See Why God Doesn’t Answer My Prayers?
I am convinced God is always seeking to intervene when possible. Pray for miracles, but don’t assume God can answer our prayers but doesn’t for some unknown reason. God suffers with us, but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering happens, though God is dying to help. We can pray but be more understanding when God can’t answer our prayers. Pray to God for emotional support and encouragement in difficult times. My silent Friend has gotten me through some difficult times when my brain begins to wander.
Did God really choose the Holocaust by not responding, including senseless suffering to children in the world?
Do you read the Bible Edwards?
I believe we should assume the Bible isn’t inspired by God. We can’t prove the Bible is or isn’t inspired by God. Besides, the Bible is literature that requires interpretation and we don’t all agree on the correct interpretation even concerning moral issues such as if God condemns gays or not. Many assume inspiration means God approved or controlled all recorded by the writers, especially characterizations of God. Many don’t think of inspiration as meaning that God encouraged or motivated writers/editors to record their understanding of God, thus possible being right or wrong.
See here all my rants on the Bible and why we need to rethink our understanding of the Bible.
So, what good is God?
The only God worth believing in or having a relationship with must be a perfect Lover. God can’t be all-powerful or controlling and be true to God’s nature. Thomas Jay Oord in his books says that so many positive elements can come from affirming a universal, divine Lover. Such a Spirit empowers, inspires, and accompanies us in our relationships with others. God knows and empathizes with us in our suffering. This is what I have experienced. God obviously grieves due to all the evil in the world. God suffered when Jesus was crucified. God suggested through Jesus’ example and words what kind of life lived here on earth can make for a much grander world. My relationship with God, though a silent friend, has carried me so far.
My future
I thought initially that surgery and removing the tumor out of my brain was my greatest danger, when discovered I had a tumor. Thus, why I tried to prepare the family and get financial house in order, as I thought I might not be back. Turns out most don’t die on the surgery table. Motor and physical skills can be damaged, which I didn’t realize as much, but I had a great surgeon. I was only in hospital two days after brain surgery, had brain fog for a week (you had to have 5 PHDs to understand my texts), but I felt pretty good after a week. It does help to be retired. I began radiation and chemo therapy for 6 weeks. So far, no nausea, I can handle the tiredness because I was very active before tumor. I get tired – I get moving. Sitting makes me more tired. My stamina affected but I can change some of my habits to hopefully see my grandchildren become teenagers. I am a cool POPS. I didn’t have a relationship with my grandparents, so I want to get it right as I did as a parent when I had children.
I am walking on the average 2-3 miles a day. Playing tennis two days a week. But, 5 weeks of great fortune with treatment doesn’t guarantee the next week of treatment and thereafter. And it takes some weeks after treatment to recover from tiredness, etc. So the journey ain’t over! I will have an MRI August 6th, a month after treatment to see how much treatment was successful with the cancer. Even if very successful I may be prone to seizers and other medical matters down the road. I could live a year but some with my type of cancer live 10 years or more. We will see. Thank God for God, family, and my friends. Peace!
February 25, 2026 – Update of my brain cancer journey
I have mainly written this journey to hopefully help some suffering and disappointed with God. What we have been told about God may not always be true. This is the first time I am responding to the above post written 6/22/25 when a tumor was found in my brain. I still have brain cancer. The tumor was removed but I still get brain scans every 2-3 months that the tumor is not back growing. I am done with radiation and chemo treatment for the next 6 months but who knows after that. For some reason the initial diagnosis of the MRI that you have a tumor in your head didn’t freak me out. I don’t have scan freak-outs (maybe because I take a zanax), but I am too aware that brain cancer could come back and what decisions have to be made. I don’t know if I want to go through chemo again or whatever.
Spiritually speaking, I know God didn’t cause or allow this. See above. God and I are good thanks goodness. God has been my biggest comfort through this journey as well as my amazing partner Janet. And I have amazing kids, I can talk and share with God with all my thoughts without feeling that God doesn’t care by allowing/cause my cancer. I happen to believe God is the perfect lover. I am free to speculate what that means. Basically – how I should love others like I want to be loved. How I wish to be loved and know how I should love others is how God loves!
Future fears – honestly, this second leg of my journey has been more challenging. I have had a few setbacks but not like having head split open and possibly coming back brain damaged. I got a skin disorder (bullous pemphigold) and a mild case of shingles from treatment. Going through infusion treatment. I got a low blood count making me susceptible to infections but good to go. I gained weight and knees hurt, but still walking for recovering. Tennis by choice has taken a back seat.
If you sit down and talk to me and ask questions, I may be even more open. I am not sure I will handle this second journey better than the first. I am told I have been a good patient with the initial news -fake it till you make it! I’ve been told it helped being so active and healthy. What may not be so visible is my understanding of God and my amazing wife and children.
But we will see what the future holds. I know God, Janet, and kids will be there for me.
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
There is so much violence throughout the world. Evil is alive and well even in churches, synagogues, and mosques. Shouldn’t we fight against evil? Must God-followers always lay down their arms according to Jesus’ words and example? Does non-violent reactions really end evil. Pacifism in my opinion is unrealistic. Evil only end when all individuals and nations decide to stop victimizing others.
More and more God-followers are rightly advocating for a loving than wrathful God. Many suggest since Jesus is God Himself, we should follow His words if we think they contradict an Old Testament prophet’s understanding of God. It’s too simplistic to think the Bible was written so we can simply turn to a page to get an answer for our problem. I might give my kids different advice when dealing with similar or different circumstances. Jesus too! Should you confront, should you divorce, etc.? It depends! Seek God and the wisdom of others who are slow to be certain. See: Does God Ever Advocate Violence To Stop Evil?
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
Those of who have a relationship with God desire for others to consider how such a relationship can benefit them in being more the person they desire to be deep down. Thus, we need to be concerned the influence on others the claims we make about God. It matters how God is portrayed thus perceived by others. I cringe when well-meaning people passionate about God say things like “it’s all part of God’s plan” or “this was God’s will.” Certain things we say can give wrong impressions about God. It is impossible to feel God cares when undeserved suffering visits our doorstep, and someone implies that such suffering is God’s desire or will. A fair question is “why you and not someone who deserves certain consequences for their immoral behavior.”
Many end their podcast, speech, etc. by saying “God willing” implying it is up to God if they show up again to do another podcast or event. Athletes suffer an injury on the field and imply it was God’s will. I don’t think suffering is ever God’s will. There may be consequences of actions that lead to positive change, but aren’t necessarily initiated by God. “God willing” implies God is in total control of life, death, events in future suggesting God is responsible for joys and our suffering.
God doesn’t determine life, death, or injury
Biblical support is often given to claim God is in control of all events in our lives. It is sometimes suggested God caused Hezekiah’s death. In 2 Kings 20:1 and Isaiah 38:1, the prophet Isaiah told Hezekiah: “Set your house in order, for you shall die; you shall not recover.” Actually, the Bible claims later God extended his life. And I will add fifteen years to your life.”(2 Kings 20:5–6). In the Old Testament prophetic announcements of death don’t necessarily mean that God actively causes death.
God isn’t responsible for your suffering
God doesn’t plan or control tragedies in your life. We don’t have to believe God is punishing us, that God has abandon us, or that God doesn’t care. God can’t be all powerful, thus controlling, and be loving. See What Is God’s Plan For Your Life?
God isn’t in complete control
Perfect love is uncontrolling. It is intuitive to assume an all-powerful, almighty God has complete control. We sometimes assume God has total control when we say “why God” during suffering. It is often said that God has a plan for your life or everything happens for a reason. This implies God is responsible for tragedies in your life. I doubt that! See Good News – God Can’t Be In Control!
What, no guarantees in life?
Freedom cannot guarantee a pain free universe The best news is God isn’t controlling sufferings we experience in our lives. God wants us to truly feel free to pursue our own dreams without strings attached, unlike some earthly parents. God only desires to influence us to do all the good we can, in all the places we can, at all the times we can, to all the people we can, as long as we can. The future is open to God as well. God joins us in a true friendship by sharing our joys and sorrows in our journey to be the person we deep down desire to be.
What can we say instead of “God willing”?
We can always say God’s will is we never suffer. God suffers with us when we suffer. God is already doing all they can to love on us. I have been dealing with brain cancer. I am often asked how someone can pray for me. I am convinced God is in the healing business/love without being asked. See Why Pray If Most Prayers Are Unanswered? I don’t get on my high horse and lecture others, but what I want to say for prayers: “God is already doing all they can for me in terms of my illness. Please pray I continue to reach out to God for influence, encouragement – whatever my circumstances – to keep my friendship with God alive.” So far so good, but I am early in my journey!
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
There has been much discussion about prayer with the latest tragedies – Charlie Kirk’s assassination, children wounded and killed during a school Mass at Annunciation Catholic School, etc. Why pray when God obviously doesn’t intervene with so much evil in the world. Let’s be honest – are the majority of your prayers answered in the way you pray? It is important to understand two views on the purpose of prayer. Our mental view (unanswered prayers) of God determines the depth of our relationship with God and how you pray.
God can’t be all powerful and loving, thus controlling your suffering
Some deal with unanswered prayer with the thought that God may say “yes,” “no,” or “wait,” depending on what aligns with His will and what’s ultimately best. I believe most would suggest God says no or wait A LOT. But maybe God can’t say yes though desires to do so. It is possible that God can’t be all-powerful, thus answer many prayers. Logically, how can God be all-powerful and humans have some freedom/power? It’s not that we didn’t pray enough with the right words and behaviors so God will answer. God can’t make one’s partner willing to stop drinking without violating their freedom. God can’t interfere in a job matter without impacting all who are interviewing. What if two make the same request to God? Suffering (prayer unanswered) may be because God can’t physically interfere in evil or suffering without human help. See here. God can’t just wave a magic wand. See:
God can’t physically interfere in evil or suffering without human help. Maybe God’s answering prayer is not as arbitrary as it feels sometimes. Prayer may be less about changing God’s mind and more transforming the person praying — deepening awareness, gratitude, and alignment with divine values. Some religions suggest prayer may be seen more as a means of cultivating spiritual connection rather than a request that an external deity fulfills specific wishes. The “answer” may come as insight, peace, strength, or changed circumstances, not necessarily the exact outcome you asked for. Prayer and meditation can reduce stress, improve focus, and foster resilience. Prayer can be a way to stay connected to God — like keeping a friendship alive, less about giving God new information and more about sharing your heart. In this view, prayer isn’t trying to change God; it’s letting God change you — shaping your desires, calming your fears, and aligning you with love and wisdom. Prayer is talking to gain support not manipulating for gain.
Relational prayer been a life-saver in my battle with brain cancer
I was diagnosed with a brain tumor April 2025. I don’t have to believe God caused my cancer for some hidden reason, or even that God allows my cancer – this suggests God can do something but doesn’t. We must come up with a better explanation that God simply allows – thus controls – evils but isn’t responsible for such evils. A God who can prevent evil but doesn’t is counter-intuitive to love. No loving parent or God sits idly by when they could prevent tragedies such as rape or murder. Are we to believe God doesn’t care, God is punishing us, or God has abandoned us and left us clueless about the grand plan? God doesn’t just allow your suffering! See why-did-god-allow-this-cancerous-tumor-in-my-brain/
Final thoughts on prayer
Even when circumstances don’t change, prayer often changes how a person experiences them. People who pray regularly sense peace or clarity, greater compassion, a deeper trust that they are not alone in what they face.
God is always listening. God hates suffering and is always doing all they can to intervene. We don’t have to pray so God can take action. God is always loving on us.
In our suffering we don’t have to feel God doesn’t care or that God could do something and doesn’t. God knows and empathizes with us in our suffering. God obviously grieves due to all the evil in the world. God suffered when Jesus was crucified. God suggested through Jesus’ example and words what kind of life lived by all here on earth can make for a much grander world. God doesn’t derive pleasure by seeing us in pain but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering enables me to better help and influence others that our prosperous times don’t. Jesus’ miracles turn heads, but Jesus’ suffering changed the hearts of billions of followers.
We don’t have to assume God can answer our prayers but doesn’t for some unknown reason.
Prayer isn’t as complicated when we understand the challenges of running a universe where freedom exists. God can’t change one unwilling to change. God has the interest of all in mind. God can’t make one be a better parent if they have no desire to change. God can’t answer the prayer for both people asking for the same job.
We can also talk to God for self-examination, for sharing our concerns so to not feel along in a chaotic world. Seeking God’s influence in our lives can lead to making wiser choices. God is already doing all they can in a free world. Pretending God can simply heal without accounting for freedom and other factors makes one’s suffering worse. God is tireless in working through individual lives to change the world.
Praying can remind us to offer help. God is an omnipresent Spirit. God already knows needs before spoken. It is easier sometimes to pray for someone rather than take cooperative actions with God. This may be the most common way that God answers prayers. Rather than praying your friend’s partner stop drinking, which is harming their family, see if your friend would rather you say something to their partner. When you know two friends are in conflict, speak to the one wrongly denying any wrongdoing. God always seeks our permission to use our lives to help others.
Prayer is more than asking for things. We can also talk to God for self-examination, for sharing our concerns so to not feel alone in a chaotic world. Seeking God’s influence in our lives can lead to making wiser choices. God is already doing all they can in a free world. Pretending God can simply heal without accounting for freedom makes one’s suffering worse. God is tireless in working through individual lives to change the world.
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
It should be obvious, but wasn’t to me early in my journey with God, that even if the Bible is inspired by God, our interpretations of the Bible are not inspired. It is rarely admitted that our interpretative views of God according to the Bible could be right or wrong. Some say God condemns gays according to the Bible, others interpret the same passages differently. Even if we could prove God inspired every word in the Bible (God controlling what writers thought and recorded), we should always question interpretations since biblical scholars interpret differently the same passages. Supposed inspired interpretations lead others away from God.
But when we don’t assume God inspired the Bible, interpretations are more likely to become discussions rather than definitive declarations about God.
Supposed inspired interpretations lead to violence
The challenge is many interpret their inspired Book as God being violent or advocating violence. This has led to imitating or justifying violence in the name of a perfect loving God. We can’t prove God controlled the writers’ thoughts to always understand God perfectly. We should always question if God really inspired the writers’ thoughts if contradictory of a loving God.
Many interpret the Quran or the Bible advocating killing Jews or condemning gays, because Allah or God supposedly approves such actions. Many don’t acknowledge their interpretation could be wrong. God supposedly orders Israel to commit hundreds of atrocities in the OT – “… put to death men and women, children and infants, cattle and sheep, camels and donkeys” (I Sam. 15:3). God’s possible justification of violence can lead to advocating capital punishment, blowing up abortion clinics, or unnecessary wars in the name of God.
Did God really “say” death for cursing, gathering sticks, etc.
When it comes to many of the laws, the OT claims God spoke these words (Exodus 20:1). Biblical writers rarely claim audible God-speak. “God said” recorded hundreds of times in the Bible is most likely a figure of speech expressing inner impressions or understandings about God – right or wrong. We can’t be sure the writers heard inner God’s voice correctly?
Did God really mandate whoever curses their parents be put to death (Ex. 21:17)?
Did God really mandate to death a man gathering sticks on the Sabbath (Num 15:32-36)?
Did God really require death for adultery (Lev 20:10)? That’s a lot of bodies today
Did God really command whoever does work on the Sabbath be put to death (Ex 31:15)?
Did God really command death for those who blaspheme the name of the Lord (Lev 24:16)?
Inspired interpretations lead to wrong views of God
Supposed inspired interpretations give the wrong image of God, thus turning others away from God. Ancient literature subject to interpretation cannot be the definitive word on truth. The truth is biblical scholars who have a deep respect for Scriptures don’t agree what the Bible says about hell, women, gays and other moral issues. See here. See here.See here. Gays are often condemned, women’s leadership roles are limited despite their gifts, and infidels face a torturous afterlife – all declared to be true in God’s name. People often reject God because of such claims made about God.
We quit using our moral intuitions, therefore possible trusting wrong interpretations
Many who claim that God inspired all written in the Bible to be true about God suggests we are made in God’s image. (Gen 1:27) If God is good, this suggests God created us with an inborn sense of good and evil. Self-evident rights aren’t hidden in the Bible or any Book. Even the Bible suggests we aren’t morally clueless. We are encouraged to be perfect like God (Mt. 5:48) or follow God’s example. (Eph 5:1). When we don’t assume God inspired the Bible, we are more likely to use common moral sense when interpreting the Bible. I admit my views could be wrong.
What is the path forward?
The Bible still can inspire useful thinking about God. The Bible is God’s story beginning with Israel and culminating with the life of Jesus that we don’t possess in other documents. God may have inspired/encouraged the writers to write but didn’t necessarily approve of everything written about God. When reading the Bible, contemplate what a loving God is really like. Enjoy what God is trying to reveal to you about your Creator and how to treat others.
A Book must not replace our relationship with God and common moral sense. Questioning the Bible may lead to knowing God better! Interpretations about God’s love, that don’t match how you and most know you ought to love your neighbor, may be amiss. Consider how to go the extra mile. Consider what actions might possibly lead to reconciliation or change in hearts if others open. The Bible is valuable because it suggests handling challenges from a spiritual than human perspective. How can we live a life of love and treating others like we want to be treated?
Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like
When it comes to Christianity with all its different denominations, interpretations, different versions of the Bible and such, it seems there are always times when we run into conflict with others.
Each of us as brothers or sisters in Christ seem to want it our way. Our church, our interpretation, our version of the Bible. We each feel that we are right and feel the need to distance ourselves from those who feel differently.
Have you noticed how religion wants to set the rules so each of us know what it takes to be a good Christian? Do this, don’t do that, stay away from this and make sure you participate in that. Be in every service and be active with this group or that group. If you are not reading a particular version of the Bible, you are just wasting your time, if you are not part of a church, you must be backslidden, at least that is the way some fellow Christians make you feel. Rules, rules, rules.
Maybe it is time to stop arguing over denominations, interpretations, versions, and church attendance and start focusing on Christ, who is to be our first love. If we can focus on God’s love and sharing that love with others, we should be able to agree to disagree on other topics.
When we find common ground in our faith in Christ, when we love God with all our heart, soul, strength and mind, we should be able to look past the minor differences we have in our various denominations, interpretations and Bible versions.
Let’s stop fighting against each other and begin to love one another as Christ loves us. Do not let the minor differences come between the love we can have for one another and the things we can share and learn through fellowship with our brothers and sisters in Christ.
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Michael Donahoe was added as a writer for Done with Religion as his views fit perfectly with those that are shared on this site. He and his wife have been outside the walls of religion for fifteen years. He enjoys writing about his experiences and thoughts, and he wants to encourage others who are going through the religious deconstruction process. He also writes on Substack at https://deconstructiontrail.substack.com/ and https://personalmeanderings.substack.com/
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