by Michael Donahoe
The word deconstruction has become popular in recent years, and for me, it has become personal. What exactly do we mean by deconstruction?
First, I can honestly say that twenty years ago I would not have any idea what deconstruction was, other than tearing down a house or building. I can also say, if I had found out back then what it was spiritually, I would have wanted nothing to do with it.
Fifteen years later, everything changed. Deconstruction became very important to me once I realized that I was already starting to go through it. I had been having many questions about the church and the things I was taught growing up. Many things were not making sense and it seemed there had to be more than just sitting in church once a week.
The definition of deconstruction is the analytic examination of something (such as a theory) often in order to reveal its inadequacy; spiritually speaking it is questioning, re-evaluating, and even dismantling aspects of faith or religious practices. It does not actually mean demolition, instead it means breaking down or analyzing something to discover its true significance, which is supposedly almost never exactly what the author intended.
Over the fifty-five years I spent going to church, I had many questions. Unfortunately, I felt I could not ask those questions because people would think I did not have enough faith. Yet, in time I got to a point that I started asking questions anyway and searching for answers, which led to me to start my deconstruction process.
Of course, in time, I came to a point where I started to rebuild my faith with new ideas and new ways of looking at things. I had a kind of faith that was freer and made more sense. Not that I had all the answers, but now I was not afraid to ask questions and admit my doubts. I found out there was a term for this, which is reconstruction. A rebuilding of my faith without the church doctrine and the certainty I felt I had to have while in the religious organization.
Reconstructing our faith is rebuilding some of the interpretations and spiritual ideas without destroying our faith foundation. It is seeing things differently, being open to asking questions and admitting we do not know everything. It is a faith of uncertainty more than being closed-minded and set in our ways.
I was now free to walk with God outside of set doctrines and some of the ways I was taught in church. I could now follow the Spirit without the religious requirements, all the while learning to love and accept all people.
Deconstruction and Reconstruction all lead to Transformation, which is a profound and lasting shift in self-concept, mindset, and overall way of being. I now felt comfortable not knowing all the answers and not feeling guilty because of it. I could accept people from different walks of life and different faiths without the guilt that religion sometimes puts on me. I was free from the doctrines and religious interpretations that kept me in submission. Now I depend on guidance from the Spirit that lives within me rather the views and opinions of other human beings.
Although deconstruction can be an important part of our life, I do not think we should stay there. Yet, I do believe we should be continually going through deconstruction and reconstruction, and continually being transformed. We should not become stagnant, but constantly changing as the Spirit leads us day by day.
God is so much bigger than we can realize. Part of deconstruction for me was realizing after all the years within the church and the years following God outside the walls of religion, there is always more to learn. God cannot be contained in a building nor a book. I realize that we need to focus more on the leading of the Spirit that lives within us and less on the doctrines and views of religious systems.
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Michael Donahoe was added as a writer for Done with Religion as his views fit perfectly with those that are shared on this site. He and his wife have been outside the walls of religion for fifteen years. He enjoys writing about his experiences and thoughts, and he wants to encourage others who are going through the religious deconstruction process. He also writes on Substack at https://personalmeanderings.substack.com/ and https://deconstructiontrail.substack.com/
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