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Why Pray If Most Prayers Are Unanswered?

December 7, 2025 by DoneWithReligion

by Mike Edwards

There has been much discussion about prayer with the latest tragedies – Charlie Kirk’s assassination, children wounded and killed during a school Mass at Annunciation Catholic School, etc. Why pray when God obviously doesn’t intervene with so much evil in the world.  Let’s be honest – are the majority of your prayers answered in the way you pray? It is important to understand two views on the purpose of prayer. Our mental view (unanswered prayers) of God determines the depth of our relationship with God and how you pray.

God can’t be all powerful and loving, thus controlling your suffering 

Some deal with unanswered prayer with the thought that God may say “yes,” “no,” or “wait,” depending on what aligns with His will and what’s ultimately best. I believe most would suggest God says no or wait A LOT. But maybe God can’t say yes though desires to do so. It is possible that God can’t be all-powerful, thus answer many prayers. Logically, how can God be all-powerful and humans have some freedom/power?  It’s not that we didn’t pray enough with the right words and behaviors so God will answer. God can’t make one’s partner willing to stop drinking without violating their freedom. God can’t interfere in a job matter without impacting all who are interviewing. What if two make the same request to God? Suffering (prayer unanswered) may be because God can’t physically interfere in evil or suffering without human help. See here.  God can’t just wave a magic wand. See:

Can And Does God Control Your Suffering?

Good News – God Can’t Be In Control!

Another view is that prayer is more relational 

God can’t physically interfere in evil or suffering without human help.  Maybe God’s answering prayer is not as arbitrary as it feels sometimes.  Prayer may be less about changing God’s mind and more transforming the person praying — deepening awareness, gratitude, and alignment with divine values. Some religions suggest prayer may be seen more as a means of cultivating spiritual connection rather than a request that an external deity fulfills specific wishes. The “answer” may come as insight, peace, strength, or changed circumstances, not necessarily the exact outcome you asked for. Prayer and meditation can reduce stress, improve focus, and foster resilience. Prayer can be a way to stay connected to God — like keeping a friendship alive, less about giving God new information and more about sharing your heart. In this view, prayer isn’t trying to change God; it’s letting God change you — shaping your desires, calming your fears, and aligning you with love and wisdom. Prayer is talking to gain support not manipulating for gain. 

Relational prayer been a life-saver in my battle with brain cancer

I was diagnosed with a brain tumor April 2025. I don’t have to believe God caused my cancer for some hidden reason, or even that God allows my cancer – this suggests God can do something but doesn’t. We must come up with a better explanation that God simply allows – thus controls – evils but isn’t responsible for such evils. A God who can prevent evil but doesn’t is counter-intuitive to love. No loving parent or God sits idly by when they could prevent tragedies such as rape or murder. Are we to believe God doesn’t care, God is punishing us, or God has abandoned us and left us clueless about the grand plan? God doesn’t just allow your suffering!  See why-did-god-allow-this-cancerous-tumor-in-my-brain/

Final thoughts on prayer

  • Even when circumstances don’t change, prayer often changes how a person experiences them. People who pray regularly sense peace or clarity, greater compassion, a deeper trust that they are not alone in what they face.
  • God is always listening. God hates suffering and is always doing all they can to intervene. We don’t have to pray so God can take action. God is always loving on us.
  • In our suffering we don’t have to feel God doesn’t care or that God could do something and doesn’t. God knows and empathizes with us in our suffering. God obviously grieves due to all the evil in the world. God suffered when Jesus was crucified. God suggested through Jesus’ example and words what kind of life lived by all here on earth can make for a much grander world. God doesn’t derive pleasure by seeing us in pain but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering enables me to better help and influence others that our prosperous times don’t. Jesus’ miracles turn heads, but Jesus’ suffering changed the hearts of billions of followers.
  • We don’t have to assume God can answer our prayers but doesn’t for some unknown reason.
  • Prayer isn’t as complicated when we understand the challenges of running a universe where freedom exists. God can’t change one unwilling to change. God has the interest of all in mind. God can’t make one be a better parent if they have no desire to change. God can’t answer the prayer for both people asking for the same job.
  • We can also talk to God for self-examination, for sharing our concerns so to not feel along in a chaotic world. Seeking God’s influence in our lives can lead to making wiser choices. God is already doing all they can in a free world. Pretending God can simply heal without accounting for freedom and other factors makes one’s suffering worse. God is tireless in working through individual lives to change the world.
  • Praying can remind us to offer help. God is an omnipresent Spirit. God already knows needs before spoken. It is easier sometimes to pray for someone rather than take cooperative actions with God. This may be the most common way that God answers prayers. Rather than praying your friend’s partner stop drinking, which is harming their family, see if your friend would rather you say something to their partner. When you know two friends are in conflict, speak to the one wrongly denying any wrongdoing. God always seeks our permission to use our lives to help others.
  • Prayer is more than asking for things. We can also talk to God for self-examination, for sharing our concerns so to not feel alone in a chaotic world. Seeking God’s influence in our lives can lead to making wiser choices. God is already doing all they can in a free world. Pretending God can simply heal without accounting for freedom makes one’s suffering worse. God is tireless in working through individual lives to change the world.

Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like

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Posted in Acceptance, christian living, Love of God | Tagged answered prayer, christian living, Christianity, evil, Love of God, prayer, Suffering, unanswered prayer |

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