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Posts Tagged ‘beliefs’

Should Labels Define Us

Posted in Acceptance of Others, christian living, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , , on October 23, 2025|

by Michael Donahoe

What do you think of when you hear the word Atheist, gay, transgender, Muslim, Jew, Christian, black, white or a host of other labels we put on people? Usually, we think of something specific and usually something we have been taught or heard over the years. It depends on where you heard it or who taught you, but a lot of times what we think is something negative in one way or another.

With all the prejudices, fear, hate and misunderstanding among people it is sad that we forget behind each one of these labels there is a human being.

I know that not all people believe there is a God or they believe in different gods. Although none of us can actually prove one way or another as to what we believe about God, we are free to choose for ourselves what to believe. It is basically a matter of belief or faith or scientific understanding. Yet, I personally believe there is a God and we are all created in the image of God. A God who loves each and every one of us no matter what label humanity has put upon us. Each of us deserves love, respect, acceptance and the basic human rights everyone should enjoy.

Just because we accept one another and respect each other does not mean we always agree or always condone the actions of another, but we should be able to treat each other with kindness and respect even in our disagreements.

Rather than profile people into a particular group based on the label they are given, we should remember the individual person behind the label.

As human beings we all want to live a happy, satisfying life. Each of us have worries, bills and every day obligations, just as each of us wants to find love, be loved, be accepted and happy.

We will not all see things the same way. Each of us have our own personality, belief system, lifestyle, desires and things we enjoy that makes us happy. We cannot expect everyone to be the same, believe the same or interpret things the same. We are each uniquely made and we each have our own path to walk throughout this life.

I know many in the Christian world will not agree with this outlook on life. Many feel it is our job to point out the mistakes and sins of others as a way to witness to them. I do not see it that way. In the Bible we are told the Spirit will convict the world of sin, so I do not believe it is our job to convict others of sin. Besides, what is sin to one person may not be to another. It is not our job to be judging others. We are called to love one another even in our differences.

Jesus came to show us what God is really like and Jesus was not a condemning person. He loved and associated with many people who the religious crowd would not even think about associating. Jesus was perfect and never sinned so he had the right to condemn people and judge them about their mistakes, yet he never did.

The Bible says Jesus came to proclaim the good news, yet when we only condemn and point out the mistakes of others, that does not seem like very good news.

I believe God loves each of us and wants us to follow the Spirit. Even when we do not always make the best choices God still loves us and wants to have fellowship with us. As followers of God, I feel we are to do the same, love God and love others each day. Look past the labels society has placed on people and love the human being that God created and loves.

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Michael Donahoe was added as a writer for Done with Religion as his views fit perfectly with those that are shared on this site. He and his wife have been outside the walls of religion for fifteen years. He enjoys writing about his experiences and thoughts, and he wants to encourage others who are going through the religious deconstruction process. He also writes on Substack at https://deconstructiontrail.substack.com/ and https://personalmeanderings.substack.com/

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5 Of The Worst Beliefs That Make Believing in God Difficult!

Posted in Bible, christian living, Jesus follower, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , , , , , , on October 19, 2025|

by Mike Edwards

Claims made by Christian leaders about God, according to their interpretation of the Bible, keeps believers and unbelievers distant from God. Our relationship with God cannot exceed our views of God. Even if a Book is inspired, interpretations are not. Few admit that their interpretation may be wrong. The only God worth believing in must be a perfect Lover. God surely is like the perfect human being—defined by love, empathy, and moral perfection. We cannot know God perfectly, but we can use our moral intuitions to guide our understanding.

God is not a hellish or sadistic 

Biblical scholars don’t agree a literal Hell is a reality in the Bible. See here.  A terrorist’s God seeks to kill infidels in this life, not waiting for the afterlife. God is nothing like such a god by burning/torturing forever infidels, only waiting until the afterlife. A loving God can’t be a terroristic God. My God gave me a brain to imagine what a loving God does to those who don’t believe while living a short time here on earth. Who does God allow in heaven?

No, God doesn’t just let Christians into heaven

The majority of people born into the world didn’t have a Bible or know of Jesus. Most people accept or rebel against a certain religion based on the family born into whether it is Christian, Muslim, Buddhist, etc. A child sexually abuse by their father may struggle to accept a God who is most often betrayed as our Father in Heaven. No human or spiritual parent brings children into the world requiring their eternal destination be based on circumstances out of one’s control. A loving God can’t be a God of chance! Jesus said: “I am the way, the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father except through me” (Jn 14:6). Did Jesus really mean God only saves those who accept Jesus? This verse could mean Jesus’ way of love is the best path toward God.

We don’t know what happens after life here on earth. No one can claim the Bible, subject to fallible interpretation, has the definitive answer. We are free to speculate what a loving God might do.  It is reasonable to believe a loving God that is able to create will take forever, if necessary, to save everyone from themselves. God only wants to help you become the person you deep down desire to come. Careful the regrets you, your family, and friends will feel at the end of your life if not pursuing a godly life now. Careful that our character developed here on earth may make the change process longer and more painful in the life to come. See what-god-may-really-be-like.com/what-religion-goes-to-heaven/

No, God doesn’t hate or condemn, gay people 

Please stop saying “God loves the sinner hates the sin.” Being gay isn’t a sin.  Why would God condemn gays when they can no more chose who they love than straights can. Why would anyone choose to be gay when faced with condemnation, bigotry. We all know the psychological harm when one must hide their sexuality. Biblical scholars who respect the Bible don’t believe Scriptures condemn gay monogamous relationships. See here. Since we can’t claim our interpretations are inspired by God, shouldn’t we choose the least harmful view? See here for more rants on God loves gays.

No, God doesn’t ordain men to be in authority over women 

Does God really call women to not serve equally with men in marriage and in the church? I am not sure why any fair-minded person would think women can’t fulfill the same roles as men unless believing a Book about God teaches otherwise. The most qualified or gifted should surely lead a company. Why not in church? It is a big deal! Views on gender roles effects directly half of the human population. Men in authority over women whether in public, private, or church life is conducive for abuse at the hands of men.

We can’t know if biblical writers always wrote what they think and influence by their patriarchal culture, thus what God thinks. But, even if believing writers were inspired/told by God, Paul a main writer of the New Testament can be interpreted to suggest or not suggest hierarchical roles.  See here.   Let’s choose the least harmful biblical interpretation. Galatians 3:28 may be God’s ideal: “There is neither Jew or Gentile, neither slave or free, neither male nor female, for you all are one in Christ Jesus (Gal. 3:28).”

God can’t be all-powerful and in complete control 

God cannot be all-powerful or controlling and be true to God’s nature. See here. A God who is truly loving would not be a God of control but rather one who allows for free will and authentic relationships. Logically, how can God be all-powerful and humans have some freedom/power? The belief of God being in complete control makes God responsible for evil.

Suffering (prayer unanswered) may be because God cannot intervene in evil or suffering without human help. Even the Bible claims love does not insist on its own way (I Cor 13:5). Claiming God allows evil is not a better solution. A God who supposedly allows evil but doesn’t do anything to intervene is no different than a parent who stands by and watches their child suffer. Evil and suffering in the world may be because God can only intervene when there is human cooperation, both by evildoers and non-evildoers.

The good news for many is that God can’t be responsible for evil or their suffering. I have brain cancer. I don’t have to believe God doesn’t care or that God could do something and doesn’t. God knows and empathizes with us in our suffering. God grieves with us. God can empower, inspire, and accompany us. God can influence us to follow Jesus’ example which can make for a much grander world. God doesn’t derive pleasure by seeing us in pain but the unfortunate truth in a free world is suffering happens. Lean on God and others for emotional support and encouragement in difficult times. See what-god-may-really-be-like.com/evil-and-suffering/

Where is God?

Billions in the past have believed in the possibility of a Creator. They couldn’t all be lunatics. Nations can only have spiritual revivals when their view of God possibly changes. Do you want to be more “in” with God? I am not sure there is anything to lose in beginning a journey of faith if the desire is to live life with fewer regrets. Personally, the biggest reason for being a God-follower is the inspiration and encouragement I sense in striving to be a better human being. Give God’s influence in your life a chance if so inclined. Moral values aren’t just found in a supposed inspired Book. It is only intuitive that a Creator loves the ways their creations ought to love one another. We all seem to know the question we ought to ask ourselves – am I loving others perfectly? Or am I loving others like I want to be loved.

Mike Edwards was added as a writer and has been a great addition to the site. Mike provides many interesting views and various ways of looking at things. He is not afraid to ask questions and he keeps an open mind as to teachings of the institutional church. Mike also has his own site where he writes at What God May Really Be Like

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Yes I Am A Christian….But

Posted in Bible, christian living, Jesus follower, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , , , on May 28, 2025|

My Idea of Being A Christian is Different than You May Think

by Michael Donahoe

When I say I am a Christian, people usually stereotype me as a Christian that is something different from what I mean.

People tend to equate Christianity with certain beliefs, doctrines and actions. People who are Christian usually believe certain things, participate in certain things or avoid certain things.

Yet, for me, I do not fit into the normal mold of what people think of as Christianity. A few of those things are as follows:

I do not attend church

I do not believe the Bible is the inerrant word of God

I do not believe the world was created in 6 actual days

I do not believe the USA is a Christian nation nor God’s chosen nation

I am not Republican (nor a Democrat)

I do not claim to be evangelical. I really do not even like using the term Christian because of the negative thoughts it creates

I love and accept people, all people, male, female, black, white, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, Atheist, LGBTQ. I believe Jesus said to love God and love one another. I believe we all are created in the image of God.

I am patriotic, but not nationalistic. America is not a Christian nation nor is it God’s chosen nation. It is not OK to force religious beliefs on everyone. We are free to choose for ourselves what we believe and who we follow.

I do believe in science

I do believe the Spirit of God lives within us and we are guided by the Spirit not a book

I do believe in the freedom of choice for all people in all matters. We cannot legislate morality nor a particular version of faith.

I believe that my spiritual life and secular life are not separate but intertwined. We are not spiritual one day but secular another. Living each day is a combination of being spiritual and secular.

There are many other topics in regard to traditional Christianity I could cover, but you get the idea. When people hear the word Christian, all sorts or stereotypical ideas come to their thoughts. The main point to think about is based on a Bible verse, by their fruits you shall know them.

Rather than automatically think all Christians are the same, wait a while and watch how they act and treat others. It will be clear soon if they are loving, kind, inclusive and accepting; or if they are judgmental, condemning, exclusive and force their faith on others.

The bottom line is, we all have some type of faith. If my faith does not lead me to love, help, encourage and allow others the freedom to have their own views and faith, then I need to keep my opinion and faith to myself.

Rather than forcing my way of faith on others, my goal is to be Christ-like day by day by being loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good and faithful. Forcing your faith on others, judging and condemning those who have a different kind of faith or a different view and opinion is not loving and certainly not Christ-like.

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Michael Donahoe was added as a writer for Done with Religion as his views fit perfectly with those that are shared on this site. He and his wife have been outside the walls of religion for fifteen years. He enjoys writing about his experiences and thoughts, and he wants to encourage others who are going through the religious deconstruction process. He also writes on Substack at https://personalmeanderings.substack.com/

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How Do You Know Who Is Telling The Truth?

Posted in Acceptance, christian living, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , , , , on December 1, 2024|

By Mike Edwards

I admit that I can’t read hearts and minds to know if one is telling the truth or lying for power, financial gain, avoiding liability, or trying to save their job.  I will try to not make this political but religion and politics have much in common. Politicians often discourage civil discussions concerning disagreements and may resort to calling one a conspiracist, just like religious leaders calling those they disagree with a heretic. Open dialogue leads us to getting closer to the truth in religion, political issues, or science. Those who suppress debate – what are they worried about?

Trust those who openly acknowledge when they were wrong 

Religion and politics are somewhat different – biblical interpretation cannot be proven due to future observation but science allows objective future observations. Scholars of biblical interpretation disagree if God condemns gay relationships. Future observations will not prove one right or wrong. But in science we did learn conspiracists turned out to be proven right that Covid shots didn’t stop infection and transmission of the virus. It seems to me that science has a way of correcting opinions that biblical interpretation of ancient literature doesn’t. Trust religious leaders who admit they could be wrong, or politicians who acknowledge when proven to be wrong. Many remain silent and hope you don’t notice.

Trust those who admit immoral actions 

Would you forgive a spouse, leader, or politician if they committed adultery? That is up to you. But watch their actions when clearly caught betraying! Do they admit failure and agree to be held accountable 24/7, or do they blame their partner/stress/etc. for their actions? I am not excusing moral failures but many fail. Betrayal is a choice. I trust more those who accept responsibility and blame themselves as opposed to others.

Trust those that invite investigation or debate 

Dr. Fauci claimed rejecting him is rejecting science. But science is an ongoing discussion. Some drugs approved initially are taken off the market. Religious leaders who claim their views are God’s Word and don’t invite debate – are they afraid to defend their views in public so individuals can decide for themselves and possibly disagree. Theologians who hide behind “God said,” are claiming to be holier than those that disagree with them. Politicians who don’t invite debate – don’t trust them further than you can throw them.

Trust those who have more to loss 

Admire theologians who disagree with their congregation or superiors because they differ in their views of God. They are taking a risk in losing their job! There is not much risk agreeing with the common narrative. Watch for politicians who oppose the popular narrative. They may be more principled. Doctors who risk being de-licensed because of their medical views as opposed to Doctors who stand to benefit from the common narrative. Notice those who stand to gain financially or because of job security.   

Trust more those that admit uncertainty 

Those who claim certainty often are naïve and may have other internal motives. Certainty is an illusion unless talking about universal moral sins such as rape or incest. Most decisions are not black and white and require open debate. Assume uncertainty if you have one rational friend who believes differently from you whether it’s about religion or politics. Couples who claim certainty are headed toward divorce or a sucky relationship. God-followers and religious leaders seem hell-bent in telling people what they must believe about God according to their understanding and interpretation of the Bible. Politicians who refuse debate of their policies are no different. Religious or political leaders play God (Superior) in the lives of others by claiming to know the truth and we can’t decide for ourselves. 

Kids are lying when they don’t want to talk about what they did or believe

Trust your instincts whether one is telling you the truth. Trust those who admit wrong or invite investigation of their beliefs. Few such leaders seem to exist!

How Do You Know Who Is Telling The Truth?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

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Why Might Religious Leaders Hold To Questionable Beliefs?

Posted in Acceptance, Bible, christian living, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , , , on August 11, 2024|

By Mike Edwards

Are you willing to admit you may be wrong in your view of God. We can all agree God hates sexual abuse. I have no doubt that God doesn’t condemn gays, even according to the Bible, but I am open to discussion if you are. Disputable beliefs have different consequences for the layperson as opposed to leaders. Livelihoods can be at stake for religious leaders if they don’t preach certain beliefs according to the expectation of denominations or people in the pews. 

One’s view of the Bible is a problem

It is assumed God approved everything written about God in the Bible. The problem is God isn’t always portrayed as loving. See here.  Even if the writers understood God perfectly, which we can’t prove, we can’t claim our interpretations are perfect. Biblical scholars who have a deep respect for Scriptures don’t interpret/agree what the Bible says about God’s views about gays, women, hell, and other moral issues. A Creator surely loves the ways their creations ought to love one another. Perfect Godly and human love must be the same. A supposed inspired Book must not replace our discussion of common moral sense given to us by our Creator.

People loving certainty is a problem

Laypeople often find comfort psychologically in certainty rather than uncertainty. One may believe the seemingly certain narrative because unknowing can create anxiety. Also, disagreeing with friends or those in leadership about God’s character can lead to conflict and loneliness due to isolation. It doesn’t matter if those who proclaim certainty have good intentions or believe their ideas are right about God. Openness is critical in case we are wrong.

Not claiming certainty can have great consequences for those in leadership positions. It is not easy changing your mind in front of people you have advised to believe something different. Laypeople often crave certainty, so less than dogmatism can lead to anxiety for the flock. Threats of job security for leadership is real if disagreeing with the popular but uncertain narrative. In politics different opinions might not lead to reelection. Pastors risk being kicked out of the pulpit.

So, are we clueless what God is like? 

A Book cannot be the sole determinate of what God is like since the same passages are subject to different interpretations. Our inborn sense of good and evil, not an ancient Book, tells us sexual abuse or murder is immoral. A Creator surely loves the way creatures intuitively think they ought to love. We all seem to know the question we ought to ask ourselves – am I loving others perfectly? There will be less disagreements when we don’t insist on our interpretation of a Book. People deep down know how to handle disagreements. Until we all ask ourselves “am I acting toward others like I want to be treated,” we are destined to fail and come to a solution. 

Christian leaders must recognize their hypocrisy!

I am sure I don’t always know my own hypocrisy, but I recognize hypocrisy when I see it! Many conservative Christians leaders accuse the current government Administration and health officials of misleading by maintaining their interpretation is scientific truth. It’s hard to understand the scientific truth keeping bars open but not churches during the pandemic. It used to be not science if there wasn’t debate. Well, it isn’t biblical truth because you say it is according to your interpretation. It is true science is fluent. It is also true we can’t prove God exist much less that our view of what God is like is correct. ‘Uncertainty” falls both ways – religion and science. 

Freedom of expression because of uncertainty is critical to lead forward 

Freedom of ideas are what separate democratic societies from dictatorships. Freedom is often quashed because individuals claim certainty in their beliefs. Christians leaders condemn gays in God’s name because the Bible says so, and demands others believe as they do. They don’t consider they may be wrong. See here.  Climate experts don’t agree with the narrative concerning climate change. Claiming certainty rather than defending one’s position is not how a democracy works. One must have the freedom to make their own decisions when there is uncertainty. Religion and science are playing God (Superior) in the lives of others by claiming they know the truth and we are too stupid to decide for ourselves!

What is a religious leader to do?

When universal agreement doesn’t exist, such as the evil of sexual abuse, it must become obvious that one must be allowed to form their own opinions since uncertainty exists. We must stop being so damn certain of our understanding of God according to the Bible, especially when our interpretations are contrary to our moral intuitions. The central message about God in the Bible seems to be to strive to love others like you want to be loved. I will debate anyone who thinks a loving God, by Jesus’ example, encourages treating others like shit. We can stop labeling those who disagree with our biblical interpretations as heretics. We can stop calling those who disagree with our views of science as conspiracists. Thousands of denominations exist because of the focus on uncertain beliefs. I am convinced the only belief God cares about is loving others as you best know how!

Why Might Religious Leaders Hold To Questionable Beliefs?

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

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Allow Each Other to Follow Their Path

Posted in Acceptance of Others, christian living, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , on July 10, 2024|

by Michael Donahoe

Is it aggravating to anyone else, or is it just me? I mean the fact that no matter what you believe, what your interpretation, someone always has a completely opposite view.

You get excited about hearing some truth that really connects, and the next thing you read an article by another Christian person that completely disagrees with what you just heard.

Even more than that, most of us Christians get mad when someone disagrees with us and is different. We get on Facebook and make ourselves look crazy because we talk about brotherly love, then we fight and argue with someone because they interpret things differently….and mostly about things we cannot prove one way or the other.

We really have to stop and think that whatever it is we believe, whatever our interpretation, not everyone is going to agree with us. There is no reason for us to get mad at someone else for being different.

Some of the things we believe in life are basically all a matter of faith. We have our opinions and beliefs, but normally we cannot prove them as fact. Yet, we will argue our point and get mad at others because they do not accept our views. Just because someone has a different viewpoint does not mean we cannot accept them and listen to their views.

We need to keep our ears open to the leading of the Spirit, and follow on our own path looking to Jesus. That does not mean any and every path is the right one, but we cannot be the judge of who is right and who is wrong.

Jeremy Myers, in his book ‘Dying to Religion and Empire’ states, “The beautiful thing about following Jesus is that while he leads us all in the same direction, there are millions of different paths he can take to get us there. His goal, of course, is to advance the Kingdom of God on earth through the people of God who are being conformed into the image of God”. We need to follow Christ as he leads us, and then be ready to love all people, no matter if they are on the same path or not.

Let’s stop arguing, fighting, and demanding that everyone agree with us, and love those we meet along the journey. Enjoy the diversity and differences in others and use it as an opportunity to learn new things and accept people who are different than us.

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Michael Donahoe was added as a writer as his views fit perfectly with those of Done with Religion. He also writes on Substack at https://personalmeanderings.substack.com/

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What I Used to Think

Posted in christian living, religion, The church, Word of God, tagged , , , , , , on July 2, 2024|

What I Wish I Had Known

by Jim Gordon

Having grown up in church all my life, there are many things I used to think and believe that have changed over the years. If I could go back fifty years and tell myself some things about my beliefs and interpretations, it would be broken down into a few different areas.

The first thing I wish I had known sooner is the New Covenant did not start at Matthew Chapter One. I never thought about Jesus living his earthly life under the law. The New Covenant did not start until His death and resurrection. When we start reading in Matthew, we are reading about the life of Christ here on earth while living and teaching under the law. He came to fulfill the law. We are restored and live by grace because of that, not by any good work we do.

I never truly thought about the fact that the Spirit of God lives within us. I always thought God was way up there in heaven, sitting on a huge throne looking down on us. I now realize God is within us. We do not have to wait until we get to heaven to communicate with God. The Spirit of God is within us. Jesus said the Kingdom of God is within you. We are not God, but we are one with God, just as Jesus prayed in John 17. He is with us each and every second.

I always went along with the church being a building. I was told that we go to the Lord’s house to worship. I never thought about us being the Church, the temple of the Holy Spirit. Christ is building a Church made without hands, a Church made up of His followers. We no longer have to wait until Sunday and go to a building to meet with God. The Spirit lives within us each and every day. We have fellowship with one another anytime two or three gather in His name. That can be in a living room, a restaurant, a pub or café, and it can be on any day, because every day is the day the Lord has made.

I used to look to the Bible as the word of God. I felt we got all our information and leading from God through the Bible. Now I know the Bible is the written words that God inspired men to write. The true, perfect, powerful Word of God is Jesus. As John 1:1 says, in the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God and the Word was God. And John 1:14 says the Word became flesh and dwelt among us. Jesus in the one we worship and follow, not the Bible. We learn from the Bible, it is good to see how God provided a way for us to have access and be restored to God. It is good to read how others acted and reacted and how God dealt with them. Unfortunately, too many of us want to make the Bible part of the trinity and worship it. The Bible is not part of God. Jesus is the word. The Spirit of Christ guides us. Study the Bible, learn from it, but do not worship it and look to it as our guide when the Spirit is our guide.

The Christian life is an ongoing, daily learning process. Sometimes we get to thinking we cannot question what we have been taught over the years. It is not wrong to question. It is not a lack a faith to wonder and seek truth. In all honesty, if we are not changing, growing, questioning and learning, I would have to wonder if there wasn’t something wrong. The Holy Spirit lives within us and He is fresh and current, and is our teacher and guide. Our interpretations and views will definitely change over time as He leads us into truth. I just wonder in the next twenty years what it will be that I wish I knew now.

Jim Gordon and his wife left the institutional church after spending over fifty years within the system. Jim wanted a way to express his thoughts and concerns about the religious system and why he and his wife decided to leave the institution but not their faith in God. Jim can be contacted by email at: jimgordon731@gmail.com

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Why Do We Avoid Discussing Our Different Beliefs With Others?

Posted in Acceptance, christian living, Love of God, religion, tagged , , , , , , on March 3, 2024|

By Mike Edwards

Politics/science has joined organized religion in possessing an unfortunate quality. Spiritual and political discussions are important as they help guide our values as individuals or as a nation. Science discussions are important as health decisions are made such as responding to Covid. Freedom of personal beliefs is trampled upon by denying open debate. The truth is certainty doesn’t always exist. Climate debates are critical to decide the greatest human flourishing. Christian leaders claim God and the Bible condemns gays without acknowledging contrary biblical interpretations. We must recognize our fears that lead to denying or avoiding discussions. 

There are universal certainties not subject to debate 

No rational person argues that physical or sexual abuse is up for debate. Moral truths are not determined by a Book, popular opinion, or by a few in power. We all have an inborn sense of good and evil. Concerning non-universal matters such as immigration policies, we must have open discussions which laws are the most caring for the greater good. Most religions agree the overriding moral guide is to love others like you want to be loved. Belief or lack of belief in God doesn’t give you an excuse to not treat others like you want to be treated.

We fear consequences for sharing our beliefs

We may avoid discussions because we don’t have to take action if we don’t bother to consider believing differently. Being treated unjustly though may be a bigger fear. Both Republicans and Democrats in the past have denied the results of elections. You decide if there has been equal justice in this arena recently. Disagreeing with the perceived popular science narrative or disagreeing with church leadership about God’s character can lead to isolation or being blacklisted. Thriving societies must support individuals being allowed to form their own opinions without threats when universal agreement isn’t obvious. Why is one afraid to defend their view, if they know the “truth”?

We fear not fitting in

Groupthink is just human nature. Most humans desire to integrate with a group, get along with its members, and benefit from them. Discussing opposing beliefs can be uncomfortable. The loner must fend for himself. It’s extremely difficult to acquire or achieve anything all by oneself. If you leave your group, your options are limited to joining the opposing group or being alone. For most of us, neither option is appealing. Being your own person is a tough business.

We fear loss of security

Threats of losing your job are undeniable due to the assault on freedom of one’s opinion. One may not oppose censoring activities for fear losing their livelihood because they disagree with the popular, uncertain narrative. In politics differing with the popular opinion might not lead to reelection. Pastors risk being kicked out of the pulpit. It is a human right to disagree if one is not inciting physical violence toward others. I am convinced racism is evil (that blacks are an inferior race), but I must debate those who are free to disagree. I will win the debate!

Fear of liability 

Many pushed for mandates for the Covid Shots because they believe in what authorities were telling them. The claim that the Shots stopped infection and transmission turned out to be false. It is understandable to believe authority figures are telling you the truth initially, but there is no excuse for continuing to deny evidences that has come forth. Worse, if one knew the truth from the beginning and yet still pushed a lie, they rightly should fear liability and be held accountable. We seem to have lost sight that it isn’t real science if there isn’t debate – science is ever evolving.

Fear of loss of power and control

Unfortunately, many fear not only losing their job but losing control and power. It doesn’t matter if you think you are right and doing what is best for the good of the land. Certainty is an illusion unless talking about universal evil such as rape or incest. Try claiming certainty in your personal relationships. If married you are probably headed toward divorce. Individuals must have the freedom to decide what is the best decision for themselves, or the powerful rule the powerless. Individual freedom is a higher principle than lording over others what you “think” is right. You may be wrong! Control and power flourish when others are not allowed to discuss alternative opinions. One way to judge one’s motive is to demand answers for refusing to debate. If one is sure they are right for the good of all, why fear convincing others in the public arena?

Fear of uncertainty

Certainty rather than uncertainty is more comforting psychologically. One may believe what seems to be the popular narrative because unknowing can lead to anxiety. One can avoid anxiety by not discussing their beliefs with others who believe differently. For one to question a main belief they have been taught in church all their life, such as if Hell is real, can create anxiety about what other beliefs may be questionable. Also, uncertainty is often viewed as doubting, which is frowned upon in Christian circles. Similarly, questioning the uncertainty if the Covid shots are safe and effective, if we have gotten the shots, can raised anxiety and fear about our health.

We fear lack of civility

Disagreements are normal in relationships. We must talk to others like we want to be talked to. We must control our emotions. We can’t have discussions with those who are rude or close-minded. We can’t always prove what we believe is true about God. We can’t claim without debate if our climate control measures are best for the most human flourishing. We all must discuss differences calmly, accepting that misinformation isn’t opinions that don’t agree with your own. 

Imagine a world….

  • If we were open to defending our beliefs civilly
  • If we closely guarded one’s freedom to choose when the possibility exist you could be wrong
  • If we stopped calling those who disagreed with us heretics or conspiracists
  • If politicians encouraged open discussions to better discern together the greatest good for all
  • If Christians didn’t always claim their biblical interpretation is correct

When one does not respect your individual freedom to believe as you think best, there can be no discussion. Anyone who threatens to end a relationship because of a difference of opinion is not worthy of your friendship. Confrontation must sometimes take place with friends for one’s silence can be harmful to others; politicians must be voted out; one may have to discover new places for spiritual growth besides their current place of worship.

Why Do We Avoid Discussing Our Different Beliefs With Others?

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Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. He couldn’t find enough people to discuss God openly so he started blogging years ago. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

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Why Can’t We Discuss Our Political, Science, Or Religious Differences?

Posted in Acceptance of Others, Bible, christian living, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , , , on October 8, 2023|

By Mike Edwards

Our world seems so divided. Christians often label others heretics if they don’t believe there is a literal Hell or that God doesn’t condemns gays. Hardly a conversation starter. Science seems to have followed in Religion’s footsteps. Those who question if Covid shots are as safe and effective as claimed are labeled anti-vaxers, though they may have gotten the flu vaccine for years. In politics opponents are labeled a racist or conspiracist without proof. If you avoid discussions when others aren’t acting irrational, I would love to hear your thoughts as to why. My email is at the end.

Why Christians may suck at discussing differences

I will use myself as an example unfortunately. It’s not meant to be an excuse. I believed decades ago that God condemned gays though they could no more control their attractions than straights. I was wrong. See here.  I used to believe God sent those who didn’t have the right kind of faith while here on earth to a fiery, torturous afterlife. I was wrong. See here.  I am convinced the only reason I believed as I did was because of my understanding of the Bible. How could I be devoted to God if I didn’t follow the Bible’s teachings? Christians may not listen to different beliefs because they assume their interpretation or a biblical writer’s understanding of God is right. Stay openminded!

How we discuss our opinions is important 

We often are busy thinking we are right and preparing our response than listening. There are obvious reasons to avoid discussions with certain people. It is difficult to talk to others if they don’t control their emotions or convey they are right and you are wrong. We can’t have discussions with those who are rude or close-minded. But disagreements are normal in relationships. We can’t always prove what we believe is true about God. We can’t claim without debate if Covid shots or all the childhood vaccines are as safe as claimed. We can’t claim without debate if our climate control measures are best for the most human flourishing. But there may be deeper reasons why we avoid discussions with those who have different beliefs.

Societal influences can discourage discussion

News or information outlets one listen’s to may only report one viewpoint for whatever reason and imply other views are conspiracy. It is best to be aware of both sides of a different belief to decide for yourself. Church leadership often imply contra views to their own are heresy. Threats of being excommunicated, censored by authorities, or losing your job are real. The solution is for all to be free to discussion opinions openly without threats. If you know the “truth,” why be afraid to defend your view!

Most humans desire to integrate with a group, get along with its members, and benefit from them. The loner must fend for themselves. Both disagreeing with the perceived popular science narrative or disagreeing with church leadership about God’s character can lead to isolation or being ostracized.  Being your own person is a tough business. Thriving societies must support individuals being allowed to form their own opinions when universal agreement isn’t obvious. Misinformation isn’t opinions that don’t agree with your own. You may end up being wrong!

The fear of uncertainty can discourage discussion

Certainty rather than uncertainty is more comforting psychologically. One may believe what seems to be the popular narrative because unknowing can create confusion or anxiety. One can avoid anxiety by not discussing their beliefs with others who believe differently. I imagine most Leaders prefer being seen as knowing (certain) than not knowing (uncertain). For one to question a main belief they have been taught in church all their life, such as if Hell is real, can create anxiety about what other beliefs may be in question. Questioning if the Covid shots are as safe and effective if we have gotten the shots, can raised anxiety about our health. What if we pushed others to get the shots and we end up wrong? There may be an easy out. We sometimes trust those in authority, but we may come to realize such trust was misplaced.

What are the consequences of avoiding uncertainty?

The science often changes with further investigation. Many religious beliefs are subject to interpretation of a Book. That is why there are thousands of denominations with their own creeds. Certainty, not uncertainty, can lead others astray if one is wrong. Also, when only one side is presented, control and power grow intentionally or unintentionally. It should be intuitive denying diverse opinions is unloving and controlling. Most don’t except such behaviors in their personal relationships. A refusal to openly discuss or defend one’s views is a denial of personal choice and suggests an unhealthy dependency on “certainty.” Relax! Universal truths exist. What religion denies the main thing – to love and treat others like you want to be treated.

There can be nefarious reasons for preventing discussions 

The most benign explanation for censoring the opinions of others is not necessarily the fear of losing power as much as the fear of losing security (one’s livelihood). In my counseling career, I often questioned the narrative concerning psychotropic medications. A client is owed a discussion of both the risks and benefits of such an intervention for mental healthiness. I didn’t always share my opinion with psychiatrists in charge. I don’t fear conflict. But I am sure I feared potential loss of a job because I was in the minority and low on the totem pole. In politics differing with the perceived popular opinion might not lead to reelection. Pastors risk being kicked out of the pulpit.

The more evil explanation for censoring the opinions of others is one’s desire for control and power over others. Control and power also have financial benefits. Control and power flourish when others are not allowed to discuss alternative opinions in the public arena. Many may fear liability if they admit they are wrong and participated in thwarting discussion. One way to judge one’s motive is by demanding answers as to why one is refusing debate. If you are so sure you are right, why do you fear convincing others? Religion and science are playing God (Superior) in the lives of others by claiming they know the truth and we are too stupid to decide for ourselves!

What is truth?

Openminded people accept they may be wrong. We are more likely to be right when there seems to be almost universal agreement on the topic of concern. Most don’t defend rape, or physical or sexual abuse. Adultery isn’t wrong only in the eyes of the betrayer. But rational people do not agree on matters such as immigration policies, climate policies, marijuana legalization, if God condemns gays, if God inspired all of the Bible, etc. We must be willing to defend our views among one another rather than shut down those we disagree with. Those fortunate enough to live in a democratic society must accept the vote of the majority when comes to law setting. You can still defend your position in hopes of a future vote. May the best, most common-sense position win.

Love surely is the path forward to healthy discussions and debates 

My co-blogger rightly suggest love is the path forward. See here. We can strive to be the better person in conversation. But we have every right to oppose those who refuse to accept uncertainty and fight fairly. This can be done civilly but lack of freedom of speech is important for future generations. Leaders must be held accountable to be open-minded than certain. In our personal lives, we can try to engage with those who insist on certainty when it doesn’t exist but in time one may need to move on. We can stop labeling those who disagree with our biblical interpretations as heretics. We can stop calling those who disagree with our views of science or politics as conspiracists. Imagine how different as a people we would be if religious, science, and political folks talked openly for the common goal of pursing the greater good!

Why Can’t We Discuss Our Political, Science, Or Religious Differences?

MikeEdwardsprofilepic125

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

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What Beliefs Are Required To Gain God’s Favor?

Posted in Bible, christian living, Love of God, tagged , , , , , , on July 17, 2023|

By Mike Edwards

Spoiler alert! No beliefs are required to engage with God unless you are the Devil! It seems to me if God is real, God can work with individuals in their own journey. Hang in there with me since many readers have heard otherwise according to the Bible. How long a leash does God give? As long as it takes or God isn’t very patient, and a worse parent than I am with my kids.

What you don’t have to believe! 

It is claimed God condemns gays though who would intentionally choose a lifestyle that invites condemnation and discrimination. We are told God doesn’t want women fulfilling supposed “manly” roles though that only leads to favoritism and abuse. We are told God is a hellish, sadistic torturer according to beliefs while here on earth, but even humans wouldn’t create Hell for their worse enemies. Many claim to be so certain about God according to the Bible, but biblical scholars who have a deep respect for Scriptures don’t agree what the Bible says about gays, women, and hell, and other moral issues. See here.  See here.  See here.  We don’t need a Book to know murder, sexual abuse, stealing, lying, etc. are wrong.

Don’t I have to forgive my abuser? 

Forgiveness of others is often the central theme of the Christian faith. Many are turned away from God because claimed God requires we forgive our abuser, despite their refusal to admit any wrongdoing. For some forgiving despite lack of remorse can control bitterness. For others to forgive despite lack of remorse can cause feelings of further victimization and bitterness. Those hurt must seek the mind of God what actions in relationships are in your best interest in a world full of tragedies. You may discover God is empathetic! The Bible is not a rules book for every situation. The Bible says don’t lie, but should we lie if protecting Jews from Nazi extinction? Restitution may not be possible despite forgiveness. Be weary when the guilty start making the rules and demand to just move on.  See here.

Surely God requires eventually the sinner’s prayer?

The sinner’s prayer to avoid Hell isn’t in the Bible. When Jesus interacted with a woman caught in adultery, He first stopped the crowd’s stoning attempts. Then, Jesus simply told the woman “go now, and leave your life of sin” (John 8). Pretty good advice. Didn’t Jesus have a better evangelical spiel in case He never saw the woman again? Jesus seemed on a difference mission according to the Bible than simply avoiding Hell.  See here.

Don’t I have to believe Jesus was God in person and resurrected? 

I am not sure if Jesus was God in human form or God’s representative here on earth. Jesus did seem to have a lot in common what seems true about a loving God. Many may have stopped reading. It gets worse.  I am convinced Jesus’ resurrection isn’t legend and has solid historical verification, but others may not. Jesus told followers He was coming back from the dead and they didn’t believe Him despite witnessing Jesus’ miracles beforehand. They only believed after seeing Jesus resurrected with their own eyes. I would like to think more of us if we witness a man or woman coming back from the grave, after killed on a cross, would be convinced. You may have to believe in the possibility of a God to begin a faith journey, but don’t let doubts you have prevent taking steps toward God.  

How can we really know what God is like and expects? 

Some would argue the Bible tells us what God is like. But the challenge is we don’t all agree on interpretation when it comes to knowing what God is like. I don’t know one person, whether a church-goer or not, that doesn’t think any God worth believing in must be a perfect, loving God. The parent-child relationship comes to my mind when imaging how a Creator might love their creations. A parent’s perfect love is the same as God’s love. God’s love surely is other-directed not self-consumed. I only wish for my child to consider the possibility that my love only wants to help them in their journey of becoming the person deep down they want to become. We just want a chance to influence for good. Are we better lovers than God?

Can the institutional church be saved? 

Many of us stopped going to “church” for good reason. The reason so many denominations exist in the Christian religion is they can’t all unite and agree on the essentials. I am skeptical of the church changing because of the lack of discussion of differences. The church is no better than our politics. Attempts are made to silence differing opinions rather than encouraging a discussion of differences that may lead to a greater good for all involved. Try it in marriage!

How can we proceed without required beliefs? 

Billions in the past have believed in the possibility of a Creator. They couldn’t all be lunatics. Do you want to be more “in” with God? I am not sure there is anything to lose in beginning a journey of faith if the desire is to live life with fewer regrets. Personally, the biggest reason for being a God-follower is the inspiration and encouragement I sense in striving to be a better human being. Give God’s influence in your life a chance if so inclined. The good news is regardless of your belief – we are all still accountable to the same moral actions. Such actions are determined by discussion and striving to love others like you want to be loved.

What Beliefs Are Required To Gain God’s Favor?

MikeEdwardsprofilepic125

Mike Edwards has been writing for Done with Religion for some time and has been a great addition to the site. Mike also has his own site where he writes that can be found at What God May Really Be Like  He can be contacted by email at: medwar2@gmail.com

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