Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘christian living’

by Jim Gordon

Did Jesus teach from the Old Covenant? Was not the birth of Christ the beginning of the New Covenant? When does the Old Covenant end and the New Covenant begin? We tend to forget that the Old Covenant does not end with Malachi and the New Covenant does not start with Matthew.

Even though Jesus came to fulfill the old agreement through grace, the first thirty-three years that Jesus walked the earth He lived under the Old Covenant. He was required to follow all its rules and regulations. He even taught from those rules, yet those rules are no longer intended for us. ‘But when the fullness of the time came, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, born under the Law, so that He might redeem those who were under the Law, that we might receive the adoption as sons’. Galatians 4:4,5

OldandNewCovenant

The New Covenant began when Jesus was crucified. When He said ‘It is finished’ He was talking about the Law, the Old Covenant. Upon His resurrection the New Covenant began and we are no longer required to try and live under the Law and the way of the Old Covenant. It is finished!

The old agreement was basically a tutor. A way God used to show humans that we were unable to live a perfect life on our own. It was a way to show us that we needed someone to redeem us and restore our fellowship with the Father. Jesus came and fulfilled the old agreement and upon his resurrection made a new agreement of grace. ‘Do not think that I came to abolish the Law or the Prophets; I did not come to abolish but to fulfill’. Matthew 5:17

Now that the Law has been fulfilled in Christ, we are no longer required to try to live by the ten commandments and the rules and regulations of the Old Covenant. So often we seem to forget that because of grace we now live by faith in Christ. We are no longer slaves to sin, we are no longer just a poor sinner saved by grace although we were sinners and we are saved by grace. We are now the righteousness of God through Christ. God no longer calls us slaves but He calls us Sons. We are seated in heavenly places in Christ. This is not to say that we should go out and do whatever we want, right or wrong. We do have freedom in Christ to do what we choose, but there are consequences if we choose things that God has warned us to stay away from.

Today we choose to live a life pleasing to God because of love. Godly love is the fulfillment of the Law. We love God and we love others, we have been made righteous through Christ and we are the temple of the Holy Spirit. It is the Spirit who guides us, teaches us and gives us strength. We do not love or please God out of obligation. We do not love him because we are trying to fulfill a set of rules and Old Testament laws that we could not live up to anyway. We do what is pleasing to God because we choose to do so because of our love for Him.

Read Full Post »

by Jim Gordon

I have become more inclined to follow my feeling that the church of today is way off base from what God intended. The church being the building many go to on Saturday or Sunday, the man-made denominations, the organized religious services led by a pastor.

Why do we get so caught up on being in a building each week, sitting quietly listening to one man (or woman) telling us what God is saying or what the Bible says. God’s word says we have the Holy Spirit to teach us and no longer need a middle man. God says we are all kings and priests and able to have a psalm, a teaching, a revelation, a tongue or an interpretation.

churchisnotabuilding

Am I saying it is wrong to go to church? Of course not. I do believe the modern-day organized church is not in line with what God intended. I do believe we do not have to attend any organized church. Some will say the Bible says do not forsake the assembling of yourselves together. That is true, but it does not say you have to assemble together anywhere in particular or on a set day. We can meet up with other believers in a restaurant, a park or invite them to our home for a meal and time of fellowship. That is the Church I feel the Bible is talking about, the people not an organization.

In our day and age, it is time to get over man-made religion and the church building being the center of our Christian life and realize there is more. Most churches today are more of a social club or a big business than anything. We should focus on Jesus and build our relationship with him and realize that WE are the Church and the Holy Spirit lives within us making us the dwelling place of God. We are the temple of God.

We are to build our fellowship with God and with one another. This does not need to be done in a building during an organized service, but in spending time with our brothers and sisters in Christ. Living life daily under the guidance of the Holy Spirit, encouraging one another, showing love to all people, helping those who need a hand.

People should be able to know that we are Christians because of the love we have for God and for one another, not because of an organization we belong to or a denomination we follow.

Share your thoughts in the comments below

Read Full Post »

by Jim Gordon

So often when we talk about leaving church, people usually misunderstand why we made such a decision.

Many times, christian people who remain in the traditional church system automatically think we have left our faith, gave up on God or are in a backslidden spiritual condition. Rather than listen to our reasons and trying to understand, many are more interested in proving why our decision to leave was wrong. They try their best to encourage us to come back to God by going to church. Unfortunately, many just write us off as someone to avoid and forget.

If they would only watch and listen a while they would see that we have not left God. We have only left a system that we feel is flawed and not what God intended. We have left the man-made system to follow God in what we feel is a more natural way by putting our dependence on the guidance of the Spirit alone without the middle-man known as a pastor.

We feel we no longer get much out of the weekly organized service. We feel one person doing all the talking in a building where only a select few have anything to do with the pre-planned service is not what God had in mind. We feel that when we gather with others each of us should have a voice, some word of teaching or encouragement.

For those who are followers of Jesus, most of us grew up in the church system. That is all most of us have known. Yet it seems the Spirit is drawing many out of the system and into a more organic way of gathering. Church is no longer seen as a building or an organization based on traditions and doctrines of men.

churchnotabuilding

Church is community. It is people living daily under the guidance of the Holy Spirit and the love of God. It is coming alongside other believers for fellowship, encouragement and building one another up in Christ. This can happen anywhere on any day in any place. We can come together with other believers in restaurants, parks, pubs or houses. Anywhere two or three gather in Christ is a place we can participate and be used by the Spirit to encourage others.

For those still in the traditional system, please do not worry about those of us who have left. We have not left God. There is no reason why we cannot all accept one another and the choices we make in regard to attending a religious organization or following Jesus outside the walls of religion and traditional ways of gathering. Whether in or out of the institutional church, each of us in our own way are trying to follow Jesus in the way we feel he is leading us. Our goal is to love God and love one another.

Share your thoughts in the comments below

Read Full Post »

by Rocky Glenn

Recorded by Crowder on the deluxe edition of his 2016 album American Prodigal, there is perhaps no greater song to describe a recovering churchboy than that penned by Sean McConnell in 2010, Praise The Lord. Although McConnell himself released the tune himself in 2014 as part of his five tune EP The B Side Sessions, I personally did not discover it until Crowder’s recording. Intrigued by the album title, I streamed American Prodigal upon its release and was immediately given pause as Praise The Lord hit the playlist and streamed through my earbuds . . . someone has put into words what I have been feeling and learning:

You’re not who I thought You were – Praise the Lord

I could not reach the repeat button quick enough after the song ended and since the first listen have replayed both Crowder’s cover and McConnell’s original recording more times than could be counted. I’ve shared the song with anyone curious enough to listen and sat behind the living room piano on numerous occasions making McConnell’s confession my own. Churchboy life is summed up perfectly with each of line of the first verse:

I used to shake You like an 8-ball

The magic 8 ball is a fortune telling toy made popular in the 1950’s. Users would ask a question and then shake the toy waiting for one of twenty possible answers to appear on the blue triangle-faced, twenty-sided die contained in the hazy liquid inside the sphere hoping the response would be favorable but expecting the response to be unfavorable. The game sums up my prayer life as a churchboy. I would approach God with my requests hoping things would work out in the way I saw best or how I wished all the while believing the nagging thoughts in the back of my mind telling me I wouldn’t truly receive what I was asking and to live a truly holy life meant ultimately accepting a life filled with unhappiness.

I used to shoot You like a gun

Like a gunslinger carrying a six-shooter on his hip, I was taught to always be ready to provide chapter and verse for any answer provided in order to win an argument, after all Paul told Timothy to be “instant in season and out of season”. The silver bullet kept in reserve to emerge victorious from any moral, ethical, or theological shootout was always, “Because the Bible says so!” No cowboy goes into a duel more worried about his opponent’s outcome than his own and churchboys don’t either. The important thing is to win the argument regardless of what wounds may be inflicted.

I used to hold You like a hammer try to nail down everyone

“Do you believe in once saved always saved? . . . Do you use the King James Version? . . . Is your worship service contemporary, traditional, or liturgical . . . Is baptism by submersion or sprinkling? . . . Do you believe in speaking in tongues? . . . Is communion performed with grape juice or wine? . . . Are you pre-tribulation, mid-tribulation, or post-tribulation?” . . . These questions represent just a small fraction of the issues those who call ourselves Christians have allowed to divide us over the years. To a churchboy it’s important to know exactly where others stand on these matters to determine if they are “rightly dividing the word of truth” and if we can truly walk together in unity with the parties in question. Of course, regardless of the response to any of those questions or the position on any of these issues, the gun-slinging churchboy always has chapter and verse ready to support his stance. This carpenter characteristic of the churchboy, much like the gunslinger, is more concerned with knowing where others stand rather than taking time to understand others.

I used to keep You in a steeple

Psalm 122 begins with David proclaiming, “I was glad when they said to me Let us go into the house of the Lord.” Thanks to the death and resurrection of Jesus, the house of the Lord is anywhere a believer of Jesus physically resides at any given moment. Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 3:16 we are the temple of God and God resides in us. How many times have we referred to a building as the house of Lord? How about the number of times we have been greeted from a stage or podium with the words, “Welcome into the presence of the Lord,” or “Let’s invite his presence here”? We sing numerous songs asking for God to come without pausing to take a moment to reflect and realize we are asking God to do what He has already done. He exists in us, not in a building. His presence is not dependent upon the intensity of our singing, pleading, praying, or even on our invitation. He is where we are.

Used to bind You in a Book

Whether dueling as a gunslinger or wielding a hammer as carpenter, a churchboy is powerless without the Bible. We are taught the importance and value of the book at a young age, commonly in the form of song:

The B-I-B-L-E — Yes, that’s the book for me
I stand alone on the Word of God — The B-I-B-L-E

The Bible has been a part of my life since I was able to read. Although the language and translation of what I read has changed over the years, and I now read it more electronically than in a physical book, the Bible continues to be a part of my life. However, my view of what the Bible actually is has changed. Despite singing the children’s song above before I was able to read or even write the words to it, I believe it plants a false theology in our heads. The Bible is not the Word of God . . . Jesus is. John tells us “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The same was in the beginning with God . . .And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us full of grace and truth.” There’s much more to expound on regarding this topic than can be tied up in just a few short sentences here, but based on these words of John, I will simply say the Bible was not with God in the beginning, the Bible was not (and is not) God, and the Bible certainly didn’t sprout legs and walk among us. The Bible is not God’s rule book and it’s not Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth. It is a collection of books depicting the loving heart of a father for his children and the longing of a creator to be with his creation. Much like the grace and truth in which John stated Jesus dwelt among us, the love of God which Jesus came to reveal cannot be contained in a book.

I used to take You like prescription without knowing what I took

Churchboys follow two sets of rules: those written as the doctrines, creeds, and by-laws of whatever denomination or label with which we identify and those unwritten, yet implied and expected with knowing glances and nods of approval and disapproval. Like a strict regimen of taking two pills three times a day, we follow the requirements of daily Bible reading, quiet prayer time, weekly church attendance, compulsory giving, and loyal devotion to church leaders without ever grasping the realness and true heart of who we are really reading about, who we are actually praying to, the purpose or intention of traveling to building on a weekly basis, if ten percent is really required, or why we’re depending upon a man or men to lead us to God. Churchboys do what they’re told without questioning because it’s simply the way things have always been done.

After these lines, the refrain of the song makes its debut in the form of a rebuttal disputing the former ideas with conclusions drawn from a journey of recovering from life as a churchboy.

Now I just don’t buy it anymore

No, I’ve tried and I’ve tried to know everything for sure

But I find I know less as I come to know You more

You’re not who I thought You were – Praise the Lord

In one of his first public performances of the song, McConnell introduced the song with the following words, “The longer I live, the more I walk down the road I’m on, the more my concept of love and mercy and forgiveness gets bigger as well as my concept of God and how he interacts with us. This is a song about finally deciding what I believe and trying to walk through life acting like I believe it.” In the second verse of the song, he paints a portrait of new life discovered when churchboy ideas are left behind.

Your love’s an ocean, not a river – A symphony, not just a song

Imagine spending your life living next to a river. Its ebbs and flows are as much part of your life as inhaling and exhaling. You’ve studied how it rises and falls and know every intricacy of its behavior. The river is your life and it’s all you’ve ever known. Then one day a friend takes you on a journey to the ocean. How puny your river is now compared to the vast expanse of water before you of which you can no longer see the other shore as you could with your river. Such is the love of God. Paul’s prayer for the church at Ephesus was they would “have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is.” His wish for them continued with, “May you experience the love of Christ,” although he admitted immediately “it is too great to understand fully” much like a symphony is filled with numerous melodies, counter melodies, and harmonies throughout its movements which are experienced and discovered new with repeated listening as opposed to a single song. The love of God grows richer and deeper as you experience it and live in it. Like the ocean resting within its shores and the symphony longing to be heard, God’s love is simply there patiently waiting to be received.

I don’t think everybody’s right, I just think most of us were wrong.

The journey of recovering from churchboy life begins with the often-painful realization you don’t know as much as you think you know. Emotions of hurt, anger, betrayal, and sorrow may set in as the realization dawns, but, like most highly emotional experiences, as you move further away from the onset of the awakening you are able to not only accept, but make peace with the idea as you stand on the edge of the aforementioned ocean and listen to the symphony of his love. In the words of author Anne Lamott, “The opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Certainty is missing the point entirely. Faith includes noticing the mess, the emptiness and discomfort, and letting it be there until some light returns.”

I think that when we get to Heaven we’re gonna laugh when we can see how hard we try to make it and how easy it should be

Regardless which version of Praise The Lord I may be listening to, I cannot hear these lines without a slight smile appearing on my face. We’ve made the path to God and his love so difficult. We’ve added hoops to jump through, disciplines to follow, and requirements which must be met. Jesus simply said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” The way to God is simply believing in Jesus and accepting his love. Nothing else is required, not now, not ever!

McConnell concludes the lyrics of the song with three lines to form the bridge before echoing the refrain as the song ends. He uses the first two lines to remind us of the eternal truths: providence is endless, and mercy is a mystery. God’s love and care for us is eternal and will never expire and his mercy will always be a mystery to our finite human minds as simply can’t understand why or how his love is offered so freely. Churchboys live the way they do without realizing how freely God’s love and mercy are offered. It’s a life lived in fear of losing what’s already been given because they can’t see it’s already there.

I pray you take time today to experience the power of this song. The song plays between five and six minutes and I encourage you to find yourself a quiet place where you can be alone and simply close your eyes to listen and let the confessions and cries of a fellow journeyer resound within your heart. As a final encouragement and invitation for you to step out and experience the love of the father and to truly see God is not who you really think He is, I leave you with the lyrics of the third line McConnell penned for the bridge:

Fear is no good reason to believe in anything

Rocky

More posts in the Soundtrack of a Churchboy’s Recovery series:

Read Full Post »

by Jim Gordon

Kindness is something you do not find much in our world today.

The Bible speaks about kindness many times. Kindness is one of the fruit of the Spirit mentioned in Galatians 5:22.

The dictionary says kindness is being considerate or helpful. I think the world would be a better place if everyone treated each other with kindness.

It usually does not take much to be kind. Sometimes I think we make it harder than it should be. Something as simple and easy as a genuine smile can brighten the day of a person who is not expecting it.

bekindtooneanother

Being polite and kind to others can sometimes be just what they need to make their day. Holding the door for someone, letting them go ahead of you in line, smiling and saying hello, treating them with respect, things like that can go a long way to lift someone up.

In his book ‘It Worked for Me In Life and Leadership‘, Colin Powell said “Kindness connects you with other human beings in a bond of mutual respect. If you care for your followers and show them kindness, they will reciprocate and care for you”. Showing kindness can be beneficial not only to those you show kindness to, but to yourself as well.

We also need to remember that truly showing kindness goes beyond just the basic acts of being nice. Here is another quote from Colin Powell’s book “Don’t just show kindness in passing or to be courteous. Show it in depth, show in with passion, and expect nothing in return. Kindness is not just about being nice; it’s about recognizing another human being who deserves care and respect”. I personally think that when the love of God flows from within us, we can show kindness out of general concern and interest for others.

It is sad that so often it seems that even Christians have a hard time treating each other with kindness. There is so much disagreement, fighting and arguing over views and interpretations. We seem to forget that as Christians we all have the common ground of faith in Christ and we are all children of God. Even when we do not agree there is no reason why we cannot be kind and respectful to one another.

Be ready to show acts of kindness each day. See others as just as important as yourself. Let the love of God flow from you to genuinely touch the lives of others. You never know who it may affect and where it may lead.

Read Full Post »

by Rocky Glenn

In several discussions over the last week, the idea of being a nicer person since leaving religion behind has resurfaced. Although I fully intended to continue the Churchboy Soundtrack series this week, I can’t ignore what I believe to be the prompting of the Holy Spirit to repost this post from last September. My life as a churchboy was truly a life filled with gritted teeth, clenched fists, red-faced anger fueled by feelings of never being good enough. I cannot thank Jesus enough for setting me free from those lies and revealing to me the real love of the Father.

I pray today you live a life knowing how loved you truly are.

A Secret No Longer  (originally published September 3, 2018)

Although I have never been much of a comic book reader, from an early age I have had an affinity for the Incredible Hulk.  I suppose the credit for this would belong to the TV series that aired during my younger years starring Bill Bixby as Dr. Banner and Lou Ferrigno as his rage-fueled alter ego green monster.   I can remember the incredibly durable stretch Hulk action figure I carried with me and destroyed for much of my childhood as well.  With the most recent incarnations of the Hulk coming from the Marvel Cinematic Universe over the last ten years, my love for the big green guy has resurfaced and he is undoubtedly my favorite character of all created within the superhero realm.  In 2012, after six solo films introducing the world to several characters, we finally got to see all our heroes unite on one screen as Marvel released the first Avengers film.  It is in this film as the Avengers prepare for the final battle Dr. Banner utters not only one of his most famous lines of the entire filmography, but arguably one of the most famous lines of any character throughout the twenty film universe as his transformation to big, mean, green and ugly takes place, “That’s my secret, Cap.  I’m always angry.”

Something about the nature of a man who loses all sense of control and becomes a different creature when angered and provoked has proved rather appealing to me throughout my life and at times I have found myself to have more in common with the normally mild mannered Dr. Banner than I would care to admit.  Throughout the television series and film universe, Dr. Banner takes many precautions and makes effort to avoid anger and being provoked.  Bill Bixby’s oft quoted line from the late seventies/early eighties series is simply, “Don’t make me angry.  You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.”  We sense in both depictions of the gnarly green giant as the Big Guy begins to calm and Dr. Banner reappears that he is filled with both shame and remorse for the actions that are seemingly beyond his control.

My life as a churchboy mirrored the life of Dr. Banner.  Just as he shared his secret of always being angry with Captain America as they set off into battle, I “shared” my secret with those closest to me.  Only my sharing was done behind closed doors with yelling while red-faced and normally with tight-clenched fists and cursing.  I was not an easy man to live with but I could never let anyone know that and destroy my churchboy facade.  I was always angry.  It didn’t have to be anything in particular that made me that way, but 99.9% of the time it was simply because things were happening that I either disapproved of, did not want to be involved, did not think should happen, or things weren’t happening in the way I wanted quick enough.  Churchboys are convinced there is a correct way to do everything and everything must be done in the correct way.  When things aren’t done in that manner, anger erupts (in private, of course!) and there is collateral damage all around.

The only flaw with Dr. Banner’s secret is the same flaw I had . . . it’s not really a secret, at least not as much as I thought.  His reputation for angry, raging transformation pales in comparison to the disapproving, unhappy, frustrated, and controlling person this churchboy was.  As much as it pains me to admit and remember, I was a miserable person because I was always unhappy, I was always angry, and it was more obvious than I realized.  My life at that time can be described from the opening words of Christ in Matthew 11:28 from The Message: I was tired, worn out, and burned out on religion.

I am so glad that Eugene Peterson did not stop there when he was writing The Message.  He went on to expound on the words of Christ as follows in the verses 28-30:

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

Churchboys know nothing about living life in an unforced manner freely and lightly.  They burden themselves with ill-fitting, heavy lists of do’s and don’ts to ensure they keep their image of holiness and godliness intact and making sure their secrets remain just that.  Life without those rules and lists has proven both free and light.  In fact, as I shared in What Is A Churchboy?, I’ve learned I’ve become I’m a nicer person and not near as angry without them.

Living life in this manner is a secret I refuse to keep.

Rocky

Read Full Post »

by Jim Gordon

Have you ever passed a church building and saw a sign out front that says ‘Everyone is Welcome’? When I see one, I always wonder if they really mean what they say. I have seen so many congregations over the years get set in their ways and enjoy the people who are regulars, but what would happen if ‘everyone’ did come to their church?

What would the thoughts and feelings be if a gay couple walked in, or if a group of homeless people came to hear the Sunday morning sermon? What if an atheist or muslim group decided to stop by and join the service? Would everyone be truly welcome?

We know that Jesus literally welcomed everyone and mostly those who the religious world did not want to have any association. Jesus met with and cared for the people who probably would not go to a church, either because they would not be truly welcome or because they just did not think they would fit in.

everyoneiswelcome

Maybe that says something about our organized church of today. Maybe we have become so involved with religion, being exclusive and following the denominations way of doing things that we have lost our first love. Could we be so caught up in the trends of modern religion that we forget our relationship with God?

Maybe we need to concentrate more on living in fellowship with Christ on a daily basis. More of loving Him and loving others and less about what building we go to on Sunday morning, if we go at all. The true Church is not a building and it does not matter which day we meet or where we meet. The Church is a community of believers. Those who live for Him each and every day. We are the temple of the Holy Spirit. We should not be focused on a building but on a daily walk with Him.

To love God with all our heart, soul, strength and mind, and to love others as ourselves fulfills the law. We no longer need to worry about obeying the old covenant law. Jesus has fulfilled the law and we now live under a new covenant of grace. This covenant went into effect at the death and resurrection of Jesus. We now have the Living Word within us through the Holy Spirit. We no longer need any man to teach us the ways of God because the Spirit lives within us as our guide.

It is time to put our focus back on our first love, Jesus. It is time to live out our relationship with God on a daily basis, not just on one day we call the sabbath. As followers of Christ we walk with him daily, loving God, loving others and being prepared to give an answer of the hope that is within us to those who ask us. I pray we all let the love of God show through us so that others will know they are loved and accepted by Him.

Share your thoughts in the comments below

Read Full Post »

by Rocky Glenn

When Jim Gordon invited Mike Edwards and I to join him as coauthors at Done With Religion, I don’t think any of us anticipated the bond and brotherhood that lie ahead of us.  The three of us have spent the last six months getting to know each other discussing what we believe and why we believe it as well as what we used to believe and why we believed it at the time.  The conversation below is an excerpt of one of those discussions as we speculate why it took so long to arrive at our current beliefs if we truly believe we have become more Christlike as we grow more open-minded and less dogmatic.  Our hopes in sharing this discussion is to encourage those who may be wondering the same and perhaps feeling the same regrets expressed.

Mike:  We believe the way we do now. But we use to believe another way a while back.

I know there aren’t answers but how do we explain to ourselves and others if asked – why doesn’t God show us the light sooner. I know I am assuming we are more enlightened now than years ago. I am assuming it is more Christlike, unless clearly moral like bullying, to come off open-minded than dogmatic.

I think so many more may be open to God if there was so much less dogmatism. I know God isn’t controlling but so many well-meaning leaders and laypeople seem misguided (or perhaps we are the ones wrong) and all of us are simply trying to be faithful to God. I truly think so many are intending to be faithful to God. I dread to think how I would have responded 30 years ago if social media was around.

I’m not convinced it’s because some of us are more moral than others. If we are more enlightened, why weren’t we more enlightened years ago? I must admit watching all this on Facebook, etc. is discouraging, especially when it is Christians. So many of them seem hopeless.

Rocky:  I think your thoughts capture what is possibly my greatest regret . . . the amount of time and number of years I spent not only misbelieving but also misteaching others.  To me the best analogy would be Jesus’s parable of the tares and wheat.  If you remove the tares before it’s time you will remove the wheat also.  Although as we first come out of it our tendency is to discard anything and everything related to what we are leaving behind. The further I am away from it the more I realize there are some foundational truths planted there that remain.

Jim:  As far as why God doesn’t show us the light sooner, I surely do not have the total answer. I do believe it is the timing thing. I think God teaches us and brings us to new understanding only as we are ready for it. I feel there is a reason for the things we go through and I am thankful for the time in the church system. I guess I would not have known the difference if I had not been a part.

So many people in church today are there because they truly believe that is the right way and they truly love God. I know the many years I was a part of it I felt I was doing what God wanted and was learning about him. Really, that system is all we know. That is what we were brought up in and felt was what God intended.

I am thankful that the Spirit lives within us and does not give up on us. I know I had questions over the years but was afraid to ask or just figured there was a reasonable answer that was more than I could understand.

Fortunately, in time those questions and many more came up again and I started thinking and debating with myself about them. It still took years of this plus feeling so unsatisfied at church that caused us to come to the point of leaving. It is all a timing thing.

One thing the three of us are certain of is we are likely not alone in our questioning.  If this is a conversation you find yourself identifying with, we welcome your feedback and would love to hear from you.  What are your thoughts and experiences as you’ve walked out the journey of your faith?

If you would like to read more of each of our thoughts on the subject, here are related articles from each of us:

Read Full Post »

by Rocky Glenn

I was raised with a father and mother who loved my sister and me and were not shy about letting us know it.  Does this mean they were perfect and didn’t mess up?  They would each be the first to admit that’s not true, but as I get older and learn more and more about being a parent myself I can look back and see many instances of their love shining through.  As a boy, I struggled immensely with fear to the point of hating nighttime and going to sleep because my mind would simply not turn off and I would lie in bed traumatized by the nightmarish images running rampant through my head.  It was not uncommon for me to lay in bed and scream to the point of echoing through the house.  To overcome these fears, my mother taught me, “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.”  For a brief period of life, I lived alone with my dad.  We spent many days after school throwing frisbee in the front yard, flipping a paper football across the dining room table we had lined with masking tape for yard lines, or leaving the television screen turned on to prove to the other their previous high score playing Donkey Kong had been broken.  I never realized until becoming a parent myself how tired mom must have been dealing with a scared kid night after night each night hoping maybe tonight would be the night he finally rests or how many other things dad could have been doing instead of spending time with me.  I have been blessed by two wonderful people to call mom and dad.

Over the past week, through the writings of Anabel Gillham I have been reminded of the fatherhood of God.  Prior to 2016, I was unaware of Anabel, but during that year I discovered a collection of writings from her and her husband organized into the Lifetime Daily Devotions reading plan in the YouVersion bible app.  It’s a year long plan, so I followed the plan daily in 2017 and have since restarted the plan for 2019.  Several of the writings for the year thus far have discussed the nature of God as a father, and recently I shared Anabel’s words below on social media along with the accompanying image:

49586743_10157247516095139_5680657714309496832_o

Do you know what Abba means? It’s the Greek word for “Father.” It “approximates to a personal name,” kind of like “Papa.” It is “the word framed by the lips of infants” and by older children “expressing [their] love and intelligent confidence” in their father.* Jesus came, talking to God and about God. But He didn’t call Him Jehovah. Or Elohim. Or Adonai. Or El Shaddai. Or any other of the names that the people called God. No, Jesus came and called Him Abba, Papa, Daddy, Father.

In the book of Matthew, Jesus addresses God 43 times as Father. He took an awesome God, a fearful God, an unapproachable God, a God who was known to strike out when He was not obeyed, the God of the Old Testament . . . and He introduced us to a loving Father.

God is a loving Father and that’s what Jesus came to show us.  He reminds us of this on multiple occasions by addressing him as such.  To further emphasize this, he plainly tells us that us in Mark 10:15, “I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.”  To understand what Jesus was saying, we must clarify the phrase “like a child.”  Here’s how Anabel describes it:

With no reservations, no preconceived fears or doubts.

“Looking up” to Him — from a child’s perspective. He is big and I am little. He is strong. I am weak. He will hold me in His arms. He will hold my hand. He will know what to do. . .

Ready to listen and to ask questions, but not to express her views or to argue with Him about His views. Giving Him the responsibility of caring for her. Indeed, expecting Him to care for her. Trusting Him to care for her. Reaching out to touch Him. Holding His hand for security and comfort. Resting in His lap. Putting her arms around His neck.  Being excited to see Him and be with Him. Knowing that He is wiser than she is. Knowing that He is stronger than she is.

Although I was raised by two parents who loved me, I realize the images presented above may be difficult to visualize for those whose father (or mother) was absent in their life or who may have grew up in an abusive situation.  Given the circumstances of such situations, I’ve often wondered why God chose the parent-child relationship to illustrate his love for us and our relationship.  The one thing no one will ever have the power to change is his or her mother or father.  Many children’s lives have been changed through the power of adoption or the way a step parent or foster parent may have stepped up and filled in for another’s absence and actually became a mom or dad, but, despite the manner we experience parental relationships, nothing will ever change the identity of our biological parents.  I will always be the son of my father and my mother no matter who I would have called mom or dad.  There is nothing my son or daughter could ever do to not be mine and cause me to not love them.  I believe this unchangeable nature of the fatherhood relationship is what God is wanting us to grasp onto and it’s why Jesus came.

Jesus illustrated the father’s never ending love in the story of the prodigal son who asked for his inheritance prior to his father’s death, squandered the inheritance given to him, and returned home with his head buried in shame prepared to beg for a job as a servant only to have his father welcome him home with open arms and celebrate by throwing a feast.  Although the returning son was fully prepared to forfeit his place in the family and anticipated having to do so, the loving response and welcome of the father assured him he would always be a son. The tragic part of the story lies in the reaction of the older brother who never left home, worked for his father for years, and out of anger refused to attend the party for his returning sibling claiming his father had never thrown such a shindig for him.  I can only imagine the pain which pierced the father’s heart and sobering look on his face as he explained to his eldest son you have always been with me and all I have has always been yours.

Life as a churchboy is the life of the prodigal’s older brother.  The words of Anabel are applicable to such a life:

How we have structured and formalized (and, in so doing, ostracized) the Father that Jesus wanted us to know! For our conversation with Him to be “pleasing,” we have been told we must “look just right,” assume just the right posture, be in the right place at the right time, say just the right things, use the prerequisite Thee’s and Thou’s — and that only then will He really consider honoring our prayers.

Catching glimpses of God as a loving father who would never stop loving me or deny me as his son and realizing he had already provided all he has through Jesus is what was ultimately the beginning of the end of my life as a churchboy.

Rocky

Read Full Post »

by Rocky Glenn

I’ve shared previously growing up a churchboy for me meant nearly my entire musical education and consumption came from bands labeled Christian.  These were bands whose albums were recorded on Christian record labels, marketed to Christians, and sold nearly exclusively in Christian bookstores.  I was not totally ignorant of what was considered hit songs or popular bands, but my knowledge mostly existed only of the radio hits I would hear in public places.  I say mostly because there was also another source of information where I gained knowledge of popular music.  It was common for youth groups I was part of to attend, either in person or through recorded audio or video, seminars on the evils of rock and roll.  During these seminars, bands were scrutinized for their band names, stage acts, lyrical content, and the hidden messages found in their songs if they were played backwards.  I learned during these seminars to not only to stay away from these bands and the evils they portrayed but also honed my judgmental skills for distinguishing good from bad and determining if something was holy or profane based on how it looked or presented itself.  These tendencies stayed with me throughout my life into adulthood and even parenthood.

Part of being a parent is wanting the best for your child and protecting them from harmful and damaging influences.  To accomplish this in our home, our kids were given the same musical education I forced upon myself growing up . . . nearly exclusively Christian music.  The only exceptions to this came through movie soundtracks, singing competitions on television, or music driven video games.  About three years ago, my teenage son began listening to a band I was not too happy about.  It was a band I was certain was evil although I was truly familiar with only one of their songs.  When I first learned what he was listening to, I did what any good father would do.  I expressed my displeasure and asked him to stop.  Of course, this simply caused him to do so in secret and his love for them grew.  As he grew more fond of their music, it was more difficult to keep it hidden and he started talking to me about it and even started playing an occasional track for me to see how I would react.  His love for the band reached the point that for his sixteenth birthday, we received notice the band would be playing live during the next year within a day’s drive from home.  Knowing this could likely be a once in a lifetime opportunity, we secured tickets for the show for him and I to attend.  The only problem with attending the concert is I was still unfamiliar with all but one of their songs and, being that song is their biggest hit and likely to be the encore, it was going to be a long night if I didn’t learn their music.  Making the decision to learn more about the band and their music, and to ensure it would not be a long evening for me at the show, I asked Geoffrey to send me a chronological listing of their discography and in July of last year I went to work.  I have since consumed all ten studio recordings they’ve released as well as several other recordings.  This band is none other than the heavy metal icons Metallica.

The experience of exposing myself to their music has been eye opening but not in a way I expected.  I was certain as I began devouring the music I would be vindicated and justified in my decision to keep not only him but myself from the tunes growing up.  However, while there are certainly tracks filled with rage, hate, and anger and the use of profanity is not uncommon at times, what I began to realize as I listened were many of these tracks were simply four guys being honest about who they are, where they were, and what emotions they were feeling.  My voluntary exposure to their music began to be a spiritual parallel for how I had lived my life as a churchboy judging by appearance without taking the time to listen.

On their fifth album, lead singer James Hetfield channeled his anger over the death of his mother to pen a track titled The God That Failed.  The theme of the song is faith and human reliance on it, and of belief in a God that fails to heal. Hetfield’s mom died of cancer after refusing medical attention, solely relying on her belief in God to heal her due to her Christian Science beliefs.  My first listen to this track upset me.  I took it as blasphemy and mockery of the God I know and serve.  However, after several subsequent listens, I have come to not only to respect the honesty of the emotion expressed in the song but also to identify with it.

In penning these lyrics, James vocalized a sentiment common to man throughout existence and even displayed by many whose lives are depicted in the Bible.  Cain, when his offering was rejected, surely felt God failed him.  As a father, I cannot fathom all the emotions Abraham must have felt after being promised a son and then being asked to sacrifice that very son.  The many cries of David are written in the Psalms, even to the point of him crying out in Psalm 22, “Why have you forsaken me?”  The entire book of Job is all about a man who feels God has failed him.  The rich young ruler sorrowly walked away from Jesus after his boasting of keeping the entire law had been rejected.

When we encounter unexpected hardships in life, we often identify with the anguish shared by the band in these lyrics.  We feel as if God failed.  As my life as a churchboy began unraveling several years ago, I undeniably felt God had failed me.  I identified with these words from James:

Pride you took
Pride you feel
Pride that you felt when you’d kneel

Broken is the promise, betrayal
The healing hand held back by the deepened nail
Follow the god that failed

The life of churchboy is a life of outward pride combined with inner shame.  It’s a life of being proud of all you’re doing externally to make God happy and make yourself appear holy while hiding how miserable, hurt, and angry you are internally feeling as if whatever you do will never be enough.  When you begin to see how meaningless all the efforts to please God and appear holy are, you find yourself feeling betrayed and that the God you followed has failed.  However, the beautifully ironic truth is that God has not failed you, but you have actually lived on a hamster wheel attempting to accomplish something already accomplished for you and gifted to you through Jesus.

I never would have imagined finding God in a Metallica song, but I did.  To me, it’s not about the message James Hetfield conveys in The God That Failed but rather the emotions expressed and how honestly he expresses them.  The greatest fear a churchboy experiences is the fear of rejection from God and from others and, due to this, often feels being honest is the last thing he could ever be.

Am I claiming it a Christian song or Metallica a Christian band?  The answer to that really isn’t important and, for that matter, it’s not mine to decide.  All I can do is simply share what it means to me.  This recovering churchboy’s God didn’t fail me.  He simply opened my eyes to what He has already done.  The music of Metallica has provided a bond with my son I did not anticipate but am ever grateful for.  I could never consider that a failure.

As for Metallica, their musical catalog is now a part of my playlist and in a little over two months, this recovering churchboy will spend an awesome night together with his son.

Rocky

More posts in the Soundtrack of a Churchboy’s Recovery series:

Read Full Post »

« Newer Posts - Older Posts »